“No.”
“Stop saying no, or I’ll stay and…” He shakes his head, his jaw tight, his eyes blazing.
“I’m also attracted to you,” I whisper. “I want you, Grim. I want you to stay. To…”
“No, you really don’t.” He gives a humorless laugh and sits back down on the edge of my bed. “You’re nice, Wren. You’re so damned sweet. I…” He pauses. “I can’t be in a relationship, and you’re not the type to fuck around. When Jordyn left six months ago, it tore me up. It broke me; my dragon, too. We’re messed up. I’m not what you need. I’m not going to hold your hand and take you on long romantic walks. I can’t do the whole candlelit dinner nonsense. I’m not relationship material, and you are. We want different things.”
I narrow my eyes. “Did I say anything about wanting a relationship with you?” I counter. “I said I was attracted to you.”
“You can’t do casual.”
“How would you know that?” I ask him, even though I know he’s technically right. I’ve never had casual sex in my life. I didn’t even sleep with the last two guys I dated. I normally go out with someone for months before taking that step. I’ve only had sex with two guys…ever. I lived with both of them. Both of them were serious long-term relationships.
But that doesn’t mean I can’t do it. I know I can. I can absolutely have casual sex with Grim.
“I just know,” he tells me. “You can’t do casual, Wren. Admit it already so that I can leave. In fact, Iknowyou can’t do casual, so I need to go.”
“Bullshit!” Heat floods my face. “You’re making decisions for me like I’m a child. I’m not. I’m a grown-ass woman. I can decide for myself. Stop putting words in my mouth. I don’t like it.”
“They’re true, though, Wren. Be honest with yourself. You don’t want to mess around with the likes of me.”
“You said you don’t want a relationship. Well, I don’t plan on staying on Draig Island long-term, so that suits me just fine.” I laugh, and it sounds slightly hysterical. “Hell, we could be dead by the end of today, anyway. There may not be a long-term anything for either of us.”
“Don’t talk like that.”
“It’s true, Grim. We’re attracted to each other. Neither of us wants a relationship, so why not just have sex? Why not do it? I want you. I want to forget all about what happened. I want to live for now. For this moment.”
He groans, sounding pained.
Then he looks into my eyes, and the air freezes in my lungs.
“It won’t be making love,” he says quietly.
I roll my eyes. “We established that already.”
“It wouldn’t be sex, Wren. It would be fucking.” His voice drops lower, rougher. “I don’t do soft touches or butterfly kisses.There will be no soft and gentle anything. I fuck. I will make you come. I will make you feel good, but it will be rough. You’ve never been fucked before, Wren. I can tell you that right now. You may have had sex, but you’ve never been fucked long and hard. If you tell me you want me to stay, then I will. But I want to be very clear on what you’re getting yourself into.”
How do I answer that? I’m not sure my voice would even work right now.
“I think it would be better if I left,” he says after a moment. “We’ll pretend this conversation never happened.”
I’m wet. I’m trying hard not to pant because I’m struggling to breathe. I should tell him to go. I’m trying to force myself to say the words.
It would be better if he did go. He’s right.
“Wren?” He lifts his brows. “Say something. I’ve shocked you. Shit. I’m sorry.” He stands and starts toward the door.
“Stop!” I say, my voice strong and true.
25
Wren
He turns, and the air thins. I almost can’t breathe.
I need to be strong. I need to show him that I want him. That I’m okay with everything he just said. I need to make it very clear, or he’s going to leave. It can’t just be words; there need to be actions.
I can do this.
