Drake stands, uttering a curse under his breath. “I knew it. Once I started thinking about it, I realized. Sally mentioned that you didn’t look great when you went to see her a week ago.” He starts pacing. “Hopefully, it will ease off once the vaccination is fully out of your system, once you form a greater connection with your beast. We won’t even need riders anymore. I mean, of course I’ll need Harlow…but we won’t be reliant on riders anymore. Everything is changing. We won’t have to guard ourborders against Mistveil dragons. We won’t even need Tributes. The next period is going to be interesting.”
“So now you know. You just agreed that I don’t need her.” I snort. “I’m due for my vaccination around about now. I’ll be fine. Fuck, Iamfine.”
I don’t tell him that my dragon is gone. That he’s left me completely. That I can’t feel him at all.
I doubt I could shift right now even if I wanted to. But I will be fine soon. That, I know for sure. He’s just a big sulking pussy. He’ll get over her.
“You’re not fine.” Drake stops pacing and turns to face me. “Look at you. Look at this place.”
“It’s fine.”
“It’s not, and neither are you.” He sits back down, his expression troubled. “That’s not a great attitude to have. It worries me.”
I sit up taller. “Don’t be worried. For the last time, I’m fine. Speaking of fine, have you seen Wren recently? How is she? Has she taken the money? You need to tell her to take it. Hell, she can have my portion. I don’t need it.”
Drake’s eyebrows go up. “You do need it. Look at you. You look like a homeless person. Like someone stepped on your puppy. Like you—” He stops mid-sentence, his eyes widening. “Oh shit! Holy fucking shit. I just realized what you look like. I know what’s going on. You’re in love with her.”
I roll my eyes. “I am not. Just because I want to give her the money doesn’t mean I love her. I only just met her. We fucked…yes, sure, fine. It was good…the best sex I ever had. I would happily admit to being in lust with her, but not love. No fucking way.”
“You are!” Drake’s voice rises. “I can see it. I know it. Look at you crying like a lovesick puppy dog.”
“I am not crying like fucking anything…especially not a puppy dog.” Heat rises in my chest. “What the fuck!? If you’re going to insult me, you can fuck right off. In fact, I think you should go.” I point at the door yet again.
“You’re refusing to admit it because that would mean making yourself vulnerable.” Drake’s whole demeanor changes. “That’s why you didn’t tell her what the headaches meant, or any of it.”
“I didn’t tell her about the rest because you forbade me to, asshole.”
Drake starts laughing. He laughs so hard he slaps his leg.
“I’m going to fuck you up if you don’t stop laughing.” I stand, my fists clenched. “I swear to god. I will end you, Drake.”
“Okay, okay.” He holds up his hands, still chuckling. “Your face is going all red. Calm down.” His expression turns serious. “You didn’t tell her because I forbade you to. I couldn’t forbid you from doing something even if I tried. You didn’t tell her because that would mean trusting her. Trusting her would mean opening yourself up again. Jordyn fucked you up, and you weren’t even in love with her. You were too afraid to make yourself vulnerable all over again. Well, I hate to tell you, but it didn’t work. You fell for her. You’re fucked up anyway. You should come clean and tell her how you feel.”
“I would if that’s how I felt.” I cross my arms over my chest. He’s so full of it. Thinks he knows everything.
“Holy fuck! You still can’t admit it to yourself.”
“There’s nothing to admit.”
“You keep telling yourself that,” he mutters, shaking his head.
“I will, because it’s true.”
Drake stands and moves toward me. “If you are in love with her – and only you will be able to answer that question – but if you are, you should do something about it, or you’ll lose her. Sheisn’t going to wait too much longer for you to sort out your shit…to come to your senses.”
“Wren isn’t waiting for me.” I shake my head. “She made it very clear that she wants nothing to do with me.”
“I highly doubt it. If you actually cleaned up and tried…put some effort in, you might be surprised.”
“She made it crystal clear.” My throat tightens. “I hurt her. It can’t be fixed. It’s done.” I shrug.
“That’s more bullshit so that you can let yourself off the hook and take the easy way out.” Drake walks toward the door, then pauses with his hand on the handle. “You stay here and wallow in self-pity.”
“I will!” I shout after him as he pulls the door open.
He leaves. Fucking finally!
He’s so full of it, thinks he knows every damned thing, but he doesn’t. Wren may have looked at me in a certain way. It felt like…like maybe there was more there…but that’s gone. I fucked it up.
