“You didn’t think at all, Grim. You tried to convince me that I was allergic to dragons when you knew full well why I had those headaches. You knew, and you kept it from me. You lied right to my face.” I still can’t believe it. The betrayal cuts deep.
“I’m so sorry. I—”
“What else did you lie about?” I ask, cutting him off.
He paces away and then back, his eyes stormy. There’s guilt there. It’s a look I’ve seen before; one I didn’t understand until now.
“What else, Grim?” I can see that there’s more. I can see it written all over his face.
He sighs, sucking in a breath. His eyes go to the floor before lifting to mine.
“Did you really run into me at the park that day?” I ask, folding my arms. “You told me you needed to be in nature even though you live in a cabin in the jungle. That was bullshit. You later changed it to needing to be near water. You were lying, weren’t you?”
He sighs again, longer this time. His eyes go to the floor before lifting to mine. I see more guilt there.
That’s what I thought. My throat feels tight, and my heart aches.
“Why were you there, then? What could possibly be the reason?” I force the words out past the lump in my throat. “It wasn’t because you were interested in me.”
“I was watching you,” he admits quietly.
My mouth falls open. “Watching, as in…?”
“It wasn’t stalking,” he says quickly. “It wasn’t like that, I swear.”
“How was it, then?”
“I needed access to the vaccinations. We suspected that they weren’t what the Mainland said they were. I needed an in.”
An in.
I was an in for him.
I feel so betrayed. So damned hurt. I clutch at my chest for a moment, trying to process it.
“You knew why this was all happening. You knew about the vaccinations already back then.” The words come out as a growl. “You knew all this time, and you said nothing? On top of that, you used me. You were trying to get friendly with me to what…?”
“Yes…no… I liked you right from the start. I never planned on hurting you. It isn’t as bad as it sounds. I was sworn to secrecy. I couldn’t tell you. It started out with—”
“It was all a lie, is what it was.”
“It wasn’t. I like you, Wren. That isn’t a lie.”
“You like me, but not enough to be honest with me. You’ve beeninsideme, Grim.”
“That doesn’t mean anything. We were fucking…that’s all. I couldn’t say anything to you. I had my orders. I didn’t—”
“Didn’t what?” I practically snarl.
“I didn’t trust you, okay? There, it’s out. I couldn’t.” He shrugs, and the casualness of the gesture makes me want to scream. “I’m so sorry I hurt you, Wren. You’re a good person. You don’t deserve it.”
“Actually, Grim, you could have trusted me. You could have trusted me with everything.” I’m so damned sad right now. So hurt. I thought we had something. I thought he cared about me, at least a little bit.
“I wanted to tell you. I almost told you after Drake called earlier.” He rubs his chin.
“But you didn’t. Why didn’t you? You had every chance. We’ve been intimate. I’m…”In love with you. The words catch in my throat. I don’t say them because I’m not sure who Grim even is. I’ve been falling for the person I thought he was.
“We’ve been having sex, Wren. That’s all it was. We agreed.” His voice is hard now; defensive, even. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I couldn’t trust you. I didn’t have permission to divulge any of it. I was given orders. Don’t take it personally because it isn’t. Please try to understand.”
