“He shouldn’t have asked you to marry him in the first place if he wasn’t ready,” Caleb said.
“Actually, it’s more than just that,” Leah continued. “He said that I was too cold to marry. That I didn’t show him enough attention.” She looked over at him. “I could have showered him with attention twenty-four seven, and it wouldn’t have been enough.”
“Why were you with him?” Caleb asked. He knew he shouldn’t harp on it, but from everything she’d said about him, Derrick was a selfish bastard who didn’t deserve to have a woman like Leah give him the time of day, let alone agree to marry him.
“I’ve spent the past twenty-four hours wondering the same thing.” She released a sigh. “But I don’t want to think about Derrick right now. Please, let’s just not talk about him.”
“Okay,” Caleb said. “But I just have to point out that your ex-fiancé is a dick. One that never deserved you.”
“He totally is,” Leah said. “Which is why I would not want to use a single thing from my relationship with Derrick when it comes to concocting our fake one.”
He inwardly winced at the wordfake. He didn’t want their relationship to be fake.
And if Caleb had known her boyfriend had been such an asshole all this time, maybe he wouldn’t have kept his distance. He wasn’t in the business of poaching another man’s woman, but when that man didn’t deserve that woman?
Still, Caleb knew he couldn’t make his feelings known to her. Not yet. She’d been engaged to another man less than twenty-four hours ago. If he tried to start anything with Leah right now he was practically setting himself up to be the rebound guy. He didn’t want to be some temporary rebound. He wanted this to have a chance. Wanted it to be real.
“Okay,” Leah said. “Let’s put our heads together and come up with our own fairytale relationship story.”
“We were talking about our first date,” Caleb said.
“Yes. What about dinner at one of the swanky places on Restaurant Row in Midtown Manhattan?”
“Dinner? Really? That’s the best you could do?”
“You can do better?” she asked him.
Caleb paused for a moment before he pointed to her. “Whitewater rafting in the Adirondacks,” he challenged. “Or is that too much for you?”
Leah tipped her head to the side. A slight grin gradually lifted one corner of her mouth. “Actually, I would consider that a perfect first date,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to go whitewater rafting.”
Caleb jerked his head back in surprise. “Really?”
She nodded. “You know that beer commercial with people whitewater rafting in the Rockies? I DVR’d it. I’ll watch it every now and then and imagine myself racing across the water.”
“If you’ve wanted to go rafting this much, why haven’t you?”
“Besides the fact that I never had anyone willing to go with me?” She hunched her shoulders. “It’s just not something I’ve ever made the time to do.”
“You know what I think?” Caleb asked. “I think you need to start making the time to do some of the things you really want to do. Life is short. Why waste a day of it just sitting on the sidelines. Get out there and do what you love.”
The moment he said the words, Caleb nearly choked on his own hypocrisy.
Who in the hell washeto talk about wasting time sitting on the sidelines? He’d made an Olympic sport of it. For the past four months he’d intentionally put himself on the sidelines, too afraid to make a move.
His role in the mishandling of the Bergen County prostitution sting had messed his mind up so badly that just the thought of going back out into the field made Caleb want to hurl up his lunch. The accolades he’d received from colleagues, praising the work he’d done on other cases throughout the years didn’t matter. None of that mattered. What mattered is that he’d messed up, and because of him the lives of three young girls were shattered.
How in the hell was he supposed to put himself back out there knowing what his mistake had done?
“Do you want to know something else I’ve always wanted to do?” Leah asked. The gaiety in her voice wrenched Caleb’s mind away from his dark musings.
“What’s that?” he asked, warming up to her smile.
Her eyes glittered with excitement. “Rock climbing. It’s one of the activities available to guests this weekend, but I didn’t sign up for it because I knew Derrick wouldn’t be interested.”
“In that case you have to do it,” Caleb said. “You’re going to love it. It’s the biggest adrenalin rush. There’s some great spots in the Shawangunk Mountains over in Ulster County.”
She put her hands up. “I’m not ready for climbingrealrocks. I was talking about those walls you find at the gym.”
