I leaned against the doorframe, letting my head rest against the wood, staring at her like she was the only thing left that made sense. Because she was. I took another long pull from my beer.
"I took care of it," I said quietly.
She stepped closer. "Took care of it?" Her gaze dropped to the stains on my shirt, then back up to meet mine. "Jesus, did you put him in the woo—"
"He touched you, hurt you," I cut her off, voice low, graveled. "You thought I was just gonna let that slide?"
Logan’s jaw clenched, but there was a darker look in her gaze. "You didn’t have to kill him. Fuck, Lachlan . . . I thought you turned the woodchipper on to sell it to my parents that you were actually working.”
I shrugged. “I was working,” I stated, taking another sip from my beer before I set the bottle down on the dresser with a dull thud, walking toward her.
"He put his hands on you. He made you cry," I explained, my voice softer now, a dangerous kind of soft.
She didn’t move, didn’t breathe. Her eyes searched mine, not for answers but for the pieces of me that hadn’t completely shattered. I was still in there, barely.
"It wasn’t just him that made me cry that night,” she whispered, voice shaking.
I stopped just in front of her, lifting a hand to brush a strand of hair from her face. “What else happened?” I asked quietly.
“It doesn’t matter. This is all pretend, right? Go shower. I’m going to bed.” I grabbed her wrist and forced her around to face me again. Was she talking about me kissing her because the cops were there? Because someone was watching? Did she not realize I wanted her? I only agreed to her terms because of my desperation to have her in the moment, the same way she wanted me. But Logan was mine. I refused to have anything less than all of her, even after all of this was over, and if I couldn’t tell her, I would show her.
She swallowed hard, the silence between us thrumming with tension so thick, it could snap. I should turn away, go shower, but instead I cupped her jaw, pulled her face to mine while my fist tangled in her hair, and kissed her. Nothing about it was gentle like the one from this morning in front of her parents. I turned her around and slammed her into the wall. There was too much space between us, but I didn’t want to get blood on her. I kissed her until we were both breathless, until she broke away.
Then, softly, almost brokenly, she said, “But no one’s watching.”
I leaned in, resting my forehead against hers, closing my eyes.
“I want you even in the dark, Logan,” I admitted, and I took a step away from her and then turned to the bathroom. I desperately needed a shower and rest, and she would start her day with her parents without me.
Chapter 17
Logan
I’d told him I didn’t want strings, so of course he wanted me regardless of who was watching, or at least that was what I continued to tell myself while he showered. We could have all the physical intimacy, but my heart was fluttering from the sentiment of what he had said. I needed to have a clear head if we were going to continue to do this. I couldn’t let my feelings get away from me.
I lay there, in Lachlan’s bed since my parents had taken the guest room, another hurtle I’d have to deal with, but not right now because the sun was starting to rise and I would have a busy day ahead while Lachlan caught up on his beauty sleep after his little adventure last night.
But my heart was a mess of things I couldn’t untangle. I told myself it was simple. We were both clear about what this was—no commitments and I’d be out of here once the season was over. And yet, every time he touched me, every time his lips brushedagainst mine, it felt like this lie was breaking apart in the best way.
My chest tightened, and I rolled over, burying my face into the pillow one last time before I’d get up and face the day. I needed to shut it down. This wasn’t real.
But . . . there was that kiss in the bar. The one in front of my parents. And just now, before he’d left me to get in the shower. Those hadn’t felt like nothing. They’d felt like he was looking right through me, reading parts of me I didn’t want anyone to see.
I could hear the shower running still, and the sound of the water mixing with the light thudding against the tile was making my eyes heavy. He probably had no idea how much I was overthinking all of this, overthinking him.
I ran my hands over my face and rolled out of the bed. I needed to shut it off. I needed to be smart. I couldn’t let myself get caught up in something that would be over in a month or so. I swallowed down the emotion and promised myself that going forward, this would strictly be fun and I would let myself enjoy this while it lasted, and if there were pieces to pick up afterwards, I’d clean up the mess just like I always had.
I needed coffee . . . Alooot of coffee. I left the bedroom before the water stopped running.
My parents were on the couch, making themselves perfectly at home, but I couldn't sit here a moment longer with how much tension was in the air between us. Well, not my parents, more soLachlan and me. At this point, it was so thick, the anticipation seemed to linger, even when he was away.
“I’m taking Tony for a walk. I’ll be back,” I called out.
“Stay warm,” they replied in unison as they started talking amongst themselves about the Evergreen Festival that was now only a few days away. I quickly put the leash on Tony and made my way outside, and once I was far enough away, I released a sigh of relief. I loved my parents, but they were really making this whole no-strings-attached sex arrangement a pain in the ass. Between Lachlan working at the firehouse, me getting all of the props ready for the event, us making dinner, and just doing the daily chores around the Christmas tree farm, we hadn’t had more than a few minutes alone together since he’d kissed me a few nights ago. Granted, we could have been sleeping in the same bed, but I’d been on the couch with Tony, staying up way too late watching TV and distracting myself on my computer. Which hadn’t been too suspicious since I didn’t have to get up early and go anywhere for work and I had always had a bad habit of staying up late.
I’d been trying to be respectful since my parents were here. I knew if Lachlan got me alone, it would be game over, and I wasn’t sure how quiet I could be. But considering my mother’s profession, she’d probably tell me I’m doing more harm than good by keeping Lachlan out of my pants. Well, trying to anyway.
I could hear her in my head.Go for it, honey! What are you waiting for? That man is beyond finger-licking good. He’s toe-licking delicious.Whatever the fuck that meant.
