Cass blinked. “No. Then it’s a duck. Which in this case… Oh. I see what you did there.”
LA managed a little smile and then sighed. “I wish I hadn’t lost my temper. I shouldn’t have let her get to me. I thought I was getting better.”
“Sweetheart, you are!” Cass purred. “Be kind to yourself. It’s not even been a week and you’ve already made incredible progress.”
“I know, I know. I just…” LA groaned. “I want to be stronger. I know it takes time, but—”
“But so does healing,” Cass cut in gently. “It can be a messy process. It may hurt. It may not always come easily. It’s a journey, and you’re just at the start. You’re not going to beable to solve every problem right away and that’s okay. You are strong, sweetheart.”
“Don’t feel like it right now.” LA curled up tighter.
“Youare.” Cass smiled. “You stood up to your mother. You set boundaries and didn’t allow her or Katie to cross them. You may never be able to get her to break out of her narcissistic shell and actually listen to you, butyougrew today. You had restraint. You were vigilant. You showed your strength by refusing to let her keep hurting you. That’s why it’s still a victory.”
LA smiled a bit and nodded.
Cass pouted. “Too much like a Hallmark card?”
“No.” LA shook his head. “It was perfect. Heh, as usual. I’m just thinking.”
“Hmm?”
“About all of this being a journey.” LA slid out of Cass’s lap but stayed close, leaning his head against Cass’s shoulder. “For some reason, I kept thinking it was going to be like flipping a switch.”
Cass wrapped his arm around LA. “What do you mean?”
“Like when we first met and you said you were gonna get my strength back.” LA sighed. “I thought it would be like flipping a switch. Easy. Quick. I’d get my job back and get Gavin back and then everything would be so great, like it was before. But… it wasn’t great before. I was too afraid of having to face some new reality than to actually see how shitty everything was. And now I know it’s not that simple.
“I’m still gonna have bad days. I’m still gonna lose my temper over dumb shit and fight with my mom until she either wakes up and stops being a bitch, or more likely, I finally cut her off. I’m gonna miss my old job, even if this new one sounds like it’s gonna be something I’ll be good at. I’m gonna fuck up. A lot. Probably piss you off and hurt your feelings, even though I don’t mean to, but I… I want to be better. I want to try.”
Cass smiled sweetly and pressed a soft kiss to LA’s lips. “And that’s all I would ever ask of you, sweetheart. We’re on this journey together now.”
“Thank you.” LA petted Cass’s face. “You saved me, you know.”
Cass shook his head. “No, Elly. I just showed you the way.Yousaved you.”
LA smiled and went quiet for a few moments, enjoying the closeness and wishing the lingering burn in his eyes would fuck off. The ache in his spine wasn’t a welcome feeling either. “Shit. I forgot to take my meds.”
Cass tapped the coffee table and a small plate with all the medication appeared.
“Fuck, you’re awesome.” LA smiled. “I just need—”
Another tap summoned a new cup of coffee.
“Thank you.” LA took his meds with a big swig of coffee.
“Need anything else, sweetheart?”
LA snorted. “A giant bubble bath and a nap?”
“Would you like one really?” Cass purred happily. “I’d be happy to run one for you and then we can nap and cuddle.”
“Thanks, but no, I can’t actually take a bath. Not comfortably.” LA snorted. “Tall people problems. I can’t stretch all the way out ’cause the tub is too small, so I just end up sitting there with my knees bent.”
Cass had a funny look on his face and he grinned shyly. “But what if… you could?”
“Huh?”
“What if you could? Take a bath in a large tub?” Cass fidgeted. “Would you?”
