Page 6 of A Quick Buck


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“Simmer down,” Alistair scolded. “We’re here on business, remember?”

“Right.” Noah glared at Alistair. “And I’m pretty sure I just told you there’s no fuckin’ business to be had because I don’t have any money. Joke’s on you, old man. I’m broke.”

“Oh no.” Alistair chuckled, tapping out a few melodies on the piano. “No, you see, this is not about money. At least not in the way you’re thinking. There is one currency that is of a particular interest to me that you will still be able to help me with.”

“The fuck are you talking about?”

“Your uncle doesn’t owe me money. He owes me inblood.”

“Blood?” Noah paled.

“Yes. He killed one of our very close associates, and I am very interested in finding him so we can discuss this matter personally. Blood for blood, you see. Fairly simple transaction.”

“Bullshit.” Noah swallowed the fear clinging to the back of his throat that was making his voice tremble. “Look, there’s no way my stupid ass uncle killed anyone.”

“Are you calling me a liar, dear Noah?”

“Yeah, I am.” Noah shook his head. “My uncle is a real piece of shit, but he doesn’t have the balls to kill someone. I don’t know what kinda shakedown this is, but you’re barking up the wrong fuckin’ tree.”

“This is what’s happening.” Alistair tucked one of his salt-and-pepper curls behind his ear. “I can’t get my hands on your uncle just yet, so we’re going to keep you very, very close until he comes back. Behave yourself and you will survive this. Otherwise, well, I’m happy to take the blood debt from you.”

“Bait,” Noah realized. “You’re trying to use me as bait?”

“Ah, such a clever one. Yes. Although collateral seems more appropriate.”

“Hate to ruin your big fuckin’ master plan, but he obviously doesn’t give a shit about me. He left me here knowing you assholes were gonna come after him.”

“Is that you walking yourself up to the chopping block for the slaughter? Probably not wise to sell yourself short right now.”

Noah scowled.

“Trust me.” Alistair smiled. “He’ll come back.”

“You sound real fuckin’ sure.”

“I have friends who are helping me look for him. Until he returns, think of yourself as my guest. You will not have any access to your phone or the internet, no contact with anyone outside of this house, and you will not leave. Crybaby and Junior will see to that.”

Crybaby waved sweetly.

“You’ll stay here with us for as long as it takes for your uncle to come back, one way or another. After he and I have concluded our business, you’ll be free to go. Do you understand?”

“Fuck you, old man.” Noah stood up even as his legs trembled with fear. “That’s what I understand. You’re not keeping me a fuckin’ prisoner in my own fuckin’ house! No! Fuck you”—he whirled on Crybaby and Junior—“and fuck you guys!” He pointed at Mace next. “Fuck you too, you creepy fuckin’ smelling people weirdo!” He stopped on Erasmus. “And fuck you super hard because wow, do you even fucking blink? Fucking freak!”

They were all unbothered by the loud outburst, except for Mace who actually seemed upset. The apathy only enraged Noah more, and he was actually tempted to make a run for it just so he’d get shot and this would be over with.

“You are an exceptionally rude young man.” Alistair rose from the piano.

“Says the fuckin’ geezer who’s kidnapping me in my own house!” Noah growled. “Wow. Fuckin’ dementia settin’ in, Gramps? Do you understand how crazy you sound?”

“I do believe it’s time for that lesson in manners.” Alistair slid his belt from his pants, folding it in half and lightly patting it against his palm.

Noah froze, staring stupidly at the belt. He was so stunned by the clear implication that he laughed.

“I’m going to take you and put you over my knee,” Alistair said sternly. “I’m going to spank you with this belt until I hear a very sincere apology followed by absolute and total silence. While we’re staying here, I am going to expect you to be a model guest. Obedient, quiet, and dare I even say grateful. Do you understand, dear Noah?”

“You?” Noah laughed again. “You’re going to spank me?”

“Unless you’d like to apologize right now?”