Snod resisted the urge to comment since he wasn’t sure who Gordon Ramsay was and certainly had
no intention of eating that garbage. “What now?”
“Now, you go work the door. You keep your pretty peepers on the bar and the fine folks on the floor,”
Rees replied. “We have a strict no asshole policy here. If they turn into an asshole, bounce time. Also,
make sure you watch the stage. Anyone gets too drunk and starts hogging the mic, you get them off.
Got it?”
“Yes,” Snod nodded, suddenly thrilled that he had a purpose. He could absolutely handle this. He’d
performed security with the Order before. Manual labor aside, he was surprisingly happy with his
new job.
“Now,” Rees sighed, leisurely glancing over his nails, “any questions?”
“Why...” Snod hesitated to finish his question, but it was obvious what he wanted to know by how
blatantly he was staring at Rees’ dress.
“I’m a straight man who enjoys women’s clothing,” Rees said plainly. “I was married for a while
before my wife found me borrowing her things and decided she didn’t want to share her wardrobe. I
do not want a sex change, I prefer ‘he’ and ‘him’ pronouns, and if you have a problem with any of this,
you can hit the bricks. We clear?”
“Crystal,” Snod said quickly.
“Good,” Rees said, holding his head high. “Let’s get going.”
The bar filled up quickly once the door opened, Snod’s presence at the entry garnering several stares
from regular customers. He stared right back at them, scowling all evening.
“Amish,” Rees would tell the concerned patrons, carrying on Frankie’s lie to ease their worried
minds as if that somehow explained Snod’s grumpy demeanor.
He couldn’t believe it actually worked.
Snod learned a lot very fast. The first and foremost was that most people who sang karaoke had no
business singing at all. He could only compare the noise to the screaming of cats in heat, wishing
desperately for ear plugs. There were a couple of patrons who were moderately talented, but they
were few and far in between.
The second thing he learned was that alcohol made people very stupid. It made them believe that they
could sing when they couldn’t, which Snod particularly hated, and it also made them think they could
dance. That at least was amusing. Furthermore, it convinced them that other people were attracted to
