“I knew you had your appointment, and you’d be packing. Didn’t want to distract you.” He smirks. “You know damn well you’d be naked right now and not even close to ready if I’d shown up first.”
I brush past him, laughing. “True.”
This house is incredible.It’s everything I could ever want and more. It’s been completely gutted, but the original hardwood floors are still intact, giving it just enough old charm while still leaning into my contemporary style. It’s gorgeous.
I fall in love with the kitchen instantly—blonde shaker cabinets, matte-black hardware, ceilings impossibly high for a house this old. The island is incredible. Black quartz waterfalls down both sides, bold and clean. It’s exactly what I’d pick if I designed it myself.
The real estate agent lets us wander, which I appreciate. Jensen and I head upstairs to the master bedroom. It’s not huge, but the closet is—and it was designed by a genius. Built-in shelves and drawers, the kind you only see on HGTV.
“Oh my God, I might just move into this closet.”
Jensen chuckles. “Sold on the closet, huh?”
I glance his way. “And the kitchen. And the original hardwood floors. And the masonry fireplace.” I open a drawer and nearly squeal. “There are compartments for all my jewelry!” It’s a freaking dream.
“Shit. Hidden compartments? That’s like porn for you.”
I turn toward him, grinning. “I know!”
We move to the next room, and it stops me cold. It’s staged as a baby’s room. There’s a crib and tiny dresser, zoo animals painted on the walls. My heart clenches, equal parts joy and ache. I grip the doorframe, trying to hold both emotions at once. God, it’s adorable. And it hurts.
Jensen steps up behind me, his hands sliding around my waist. “What do you think? You like the house?”
I turn, pressing my palms flat against his chest. “I love it. I love it so much.”
He leans down, kissing me softly, and when he pulls back, his eyes meet mine, tender and full of love. “Should we buy it?” His voice is low but eager.
“You’d really move here? And work’s not an issue?”
“I told you—already talked to my boss. I can transfer to the Chicago office.”
“And what about your family?”
He shrugs. “You’remy family, babe. They all have their own families, their own lives. They’ll be fine without me.”
I laugh softly. “I’m not so worried about what they’ll do without you as much as what you’ll do without them.” I arch a brow, lowering my voice. “What about Matt?”
“What about him?” His eyes narrow. “He won’t even notice I’m gone.”
“That’s not true, and you know it.”
“It’s a good thing he’s rich as fuck and has his own plane, then, isn’t it? He can visit anytime.” A grin tugs at his mouth. “Besides, is he gonna have my babies?”
The words hit me in the gut. In a good way, but they hurt, too. “What if I can’t get pregnant?” The fear slips out, ugly and scary.
“Don’t go there. We haven’t tried in a long time.”
“But when we were trying, it wasn’t happening.”
“We didn’t try that long,” he says, thumb brushing my temple. “And I was using most of that time. You didn’t know it then, but my body was fucked. Who knows what it did to my sperm.”
I nod. Itcando that, but not usually that soon. “But we haven’t exactly been careful. Even now.”
We really haven’t. The first time we had sex again, we didn’t use a condom. Sheer stupidity on my part. My brain wasn’t anywhere near ready to handle a pregnancy with him then. Ithad just been so long, and we’d never been all that careful before—I got caught in the moment. Spaced it completely.
And nothing happened.
That’s what gnaws at me.Nothing happened.Not then, not before. I don’t even know if I’m fertile. It’s an ache I’ve carried for years, a quiet worry that never leaves.
