His expression turned thunderous.“We’re like that fucking cartoon,Beauty and the Beast, and I don’t want any part of it.”
“Is this about your scars?”she spat out angrily.
“No, it’s about you being too good to be true.”
Her mouth dropped open and then snapped shut.“That doesn’t make sense.”
“It does when you’re standing in my shoes.”
Frustrated, Myla turned her back to him and walked to the window in her living room.
“You don’t have to make up shit, Kaleb.If you don’t want me, just say it.”
“Turn around,” he growled.
She watched him cringe when she turned and knew he probably caught sight of the blatant misery in her eyes.
“I’m not sure what happened,” she stated, and then stopped, swallowed, and looked down at the floor.“I wish you would just tell me.You’ve been slowly closing yourself off from me for a few weeks.If I did anything to hurt you, I’m sorry.I never intended to do that.”
“Look, I’m sorry about springing this on you.I just think it’s best we chill.I never intended to get so involved with anyone.”
“Is this because I told you I loved you?”
He was surprised by the spear of pain that lanced his heart.He wanted more than anything to have her love, but it would cost him too much when she left.
“No, it wasn’t that.Listen, I’m going to head out.”
She took a shaky step toward him.“So, this is it?”
He ran a hand over the back of his neck.“I think it’s best.”
She took a deep breath and made herself walk to the door.She could see her hands shaking as she disengaged the locks.She slowly pulled the door open and then looked at him.
“Thank you for saying it to my face.I’m sorry about whatever happened, Dadd ...I mean Kaleb.I can’t take back telling you I loved you, and frankly, I don’t want to, because I do.Just know I’ll pray for you,” she said softly and looked down.“And I hope you’ll be safe.”
“Call me if you ever need me.”
“What if I told you I need you now, and I always will?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose.“Maybe we should just cut everything off now.It might be easier.”
She stood, staring at her wood floor without seeing anything.Her focus was to keep from screaming out at him.She never imagined pain that went this deep.All she wanted was to burrow under her covers and let the tears fall and hopefully relieve some of the pressure in her chest.
“Look at me,” he demanded.
She shook her head.“No.If you’re going to leave, please go,” she whispered.
“I want you to look at me first.”
She felt her stomach constrict as a slice of pain shot through her.“You can’t tell me what to do anymore.You just gave up that right.Please leave.”
****
The thought of neverseeing her again was making him physically ill.But he couldn’t get rid of the thought of her being with another man.A perfect man.
Kaleb stood staring at her, willing her to look at him.He knew she had sensed his withdrawal, but he had hoped he’d get past his insecurities.But seeing her that day solidified his decision to break it off now because he wouldn’t be able to take it if she left him after he put any more of himself into the relationship.She already had his heart, but he’d kept a part of himself—a deep part of his soul—protected from the pain of losing her.
He felt tears sting his eyes.He walked to the door and froze next to her.He had to fight the urge to pull her into his arms and never let go.He gritted his teeth when she wouldn’t look at him, but he’d done enough tonight without making demands.
