He eyes me. “She’s not just your client, is she?”
Misery pins me in place. “No,” I croak out. “But I rejected her.”
Colt’s upper lip curls. “And here I thought you were a smart man.”
Breath hitches in my dry throat. Even if every single person in the world censured me, I’d deserve it for abandoning my omega. “Yeah, I used to think so too,” I mutter.
Colt studies my face and then sighs. “Well, each of us has our own demons to fight. God knows I’m no stranger to making giant mistakes.” He crosses his arms over his broad chest. “If you want to help her, get her alpha back. But also, if Red accepts you being around her, just be present. She struck me as a confident woman, but I’m guessing she’s as starved as her alpha is, if she’s anything like Rose.”
He reaches for his coffee mug but wraps his hands tight around it instead of sipping. “I can’t stress enough the importance of routine and normalcy in the home environment for people recovering from extreme trauma. My omega isn’t the only one who taught me that.”
Yeah, that was part of the handbook too, but I never thought to apply the same techniques to Red. I believed keeping my distance was being respectful, but if Red needs me, even subconsciously, maybe I was wrong.
“Thanks, Agent Colt,” I say.
“Just Colt is fine,” he says gruffly. “Who knows? Maybe we’ll be seeing more of each other in the future, since our omegas are friends.”
That sounds like a good idea.
As I’m signing out at the Bureau front desk, I get a phone call. My heart speeds up when I see Ricky’s name on my screen. Eagerly I swipe to accept. “Hey, Ricky.”
“We’ve got a problem,” he announces, voice trembling.
My racing pulse turns frantic at his tone. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s Red. She says she wants to go to the Omega Center for her heat. Can you come around?”
My stomach lurches. I’m the one who got Red out of there, so I know how much she despises that place. And I also know what happened during her last heat at the Center. If she’s going back, does it mean she’s given up on everything? A premonition grips me, scaring the hairs on my arms until they stand on end.
I fling my jacket over my shoulder and stride for the door. “I’m on my way, Ricky.”
Chapter ten
Red
Callisto arrives as I’m packing my bag, and bittersweet relief pours through me as I meet his serious dark eyes. I offer him a shaky smile. “Hi.”
He steps forward, and for a split second I think he’s going to hug me, but he picks up my bag instead and sets it on the foot of the bed, where I can pack more easily. A whiff of his clean cherry wood scent slides through my senses.
His Adam’s apple bobs furiously for a moment. “Hello, gorgeous.”
I sit down on the bed, one leg under me, and give him a swift nod.
“Ricky says you’re going to the Omega Center.”
I grimace and trace the pattern on my skirt. “I think Ricky’s falling apart over the idea more than I am.” The admission costs me, but if anyone can be a safe space for me right now, it’d be Callisto. So long as he’s not here to talk me out of my decision.
No one could miss the pained expression on his face. “Can I ask what your reasons are?” he asks gently, leaning on the wall.
At least he’s asking, though I’m not sure how well I can put this desperation into words. I study my hands, pushing the nail quicks back. “This isn’t like last time. Or any of the times before.” A painful knot lodges in my throat. I work my shirt hem through my hands repeatedly and avoid looking at the alpha. “Life should be better now that I’m free, right? I’m not fighting for my life every single day.” I spread my hand across my belly, as if to feel the faint bond within. “But now I’ve had a taste of a pack . . . it’s worse. I didn’t know before, you know? What life could be like.” I sniff back a thick wave of emotion. “I dreamed, and imagined, but I didn’t feel it, in here.” My hand glides up to cover my left breast. Tilting my head, I peek at Callisto.
He moves over to the bed and sits with his elbow balanced on his knee and his head in his palm.
His silence unnerves me. “Stupid, right?” I scoff at myself. “I feel like I finally found my breaking point, and I can’t do a heat on top of this.” It could kill me. Better not say those words out loud, though.
“No, it’s not stupid.” Callisto swivels, looking at me between his fingers, and I stiffen at the sight of tears in his eyes. His voice cracks as he says, “Once you realize what you’re missing out on, it destroys you a little more every day.”
The tortured look in his gaze tells me he knows exactly how I feel.
