I slump against the kitchen bench, the marble top chilly under my hands. The air in the room suddenly feels too thick to breathe, and I choke. It’s times like these when the old demons of insecurity rise. Red’s burdened by a sense of failure, but taking responsibility for a feral human is tough even for a human with a normal past. I’m the one who failed, and my deficiencies once again made people leave me.
With a groan, I slump down to rest my head on my crossed arms. What I’m thinking sounds like something Hudson would’ve said.If you just tried a bit harder, babe, then people would want to be around you.
I peer over my arms. Ozzie picks seed out of his food dish in the cage at the far end of the room, flinging unwanted pieces onto the floor with great relish. “Hey, Ozzie. What’s your favorite word?”
The bird bobs his head and climbs the bars. “Hello. Fuck off.”
I snort. “Exactly.” Fuck off to gaslighting myself. Although it cuts me to the soul, I gotta have faith my pack will be together again. Crossing the room, I get the bird out, and he crab-walks up my arm. His hard little beak peppers along my ear and the back of my neck, as if in disapproval for my lack of hair to hide in. I lean on the windows overlooking the city and breathe deep.
Even when the sky seems to cave, a few breathing techniques can help hold me together. I have to be the strong one now.
Chapter six
Zack
I throw my shoulders back and clench my hands as the alpha’s scent thickens in my nose. Months have passed since I stalked along the fence line in the scorching sun, waiting for a challenge that didn’t come; since I climbed the chain links and threw myself into the crowd of alphas. And this one standing in front of me clubbed me down with a bench seat.
Broke my arm.
I snarl and dash forward.
“Shit!” he grinds out, catching me by the shoulders and bringing his knee up to guard his stomach. “Stop, you mad dog.” Surprisingly, he doesn’t punch back or snarl.
I wrestle his hold, senses tuned for his every move. “Zack,” I hiss.
The alpha breaks free and backs away. “Zack? That’s your name?”
“Yes.”
His black eyes widen. “Damn, you can speak?” He touches his palm to his chest. “Alhedy. Keith Alhedy.” Gingerly he holds both hands up in front of him. Defending, but not challenging. “Let’s take this down a notch, yeah?”
Al-dy. Fist clenched, I hold up my healed arm, which is paler and has less hair than the other. Feels weaker too. “Broke it.”
He laughs, but the strained edge tells me how uneasy he is. “Fuck. Trust you to remember that part. Yeah, I broke your arm because you charged us. Remember all the fighting?”
I’ve calmed down enough to realize my back’s to a doorway which could open any second. Rumbling with warning, I slide across the wall to the nearest corner, next to a metal toilet, keeping my eyes on the dangerous alpha. He’s saying I attacked first.
“Challenge. Asked fight.”
He scrubs a hand over his face, the skin stained with black marks like the art on Cal-ee’s arm. “You think we challenged you?” The alpha groans. “I suppose one of the guys stuck his hand through the fence or some shit.” He growls out a word Rickon never lets me say, and shakes his head. “No challenge.”
I lower my hands warily. At least this man seems smart enough to understand my words. “Al-dy?” I mutter.
He shows his teeth, and I measure the tightness of his lips to check it’s a smile, not a snarl. “Yeah. I’m Alhedy. Maybe ‘Al’ would be easier for you?”
“Al.”
He whistles and leans back against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. “Can’t believe you’re talking this much. Look, we’re going to be living together.” He gestures to the stacked beds. “Can we agree not to fight each other?”
His words trigger a furious refusal in my chest. “No! Live with ohm-ga. Mine.”
“Then how did you end up back in prison?”
I look around at the four solid walls and feel a stab of pain as if he had hit me. I don’t belong here anymore.
“Sorry to break it to you, Zack, but this is prison, and you’re stuck here until someone gets you out or you do your time.”
I shake my head. “Didn’t kill.”
