What, exactly?
“I want to learn,” I continued. “I know I can’t believe everything I read in romance books. I know that’s not ‘real’. But what I want is to figure outwhatI want. Because I don’t know.” I looked at Jack. “And I’m hoping what I figure out I want dovetails with what Jack wants. I don’t know what I don’t know.”
Master Derek nodded. “That, rightthere, is the perfect attitude to have coming into all of this. Being open to learning, becoming enlightened, figuring out who and what you are. Don’t be quick to focus on labels, either. You decide your labels and you can change them whenever you want. They’re a helpful starting point, but you aren’t married to them…”
We spent nearly an hour talking, discussing the rules, Master Derek patiently answering all of my questions and also giving me things to think about. Mostly, Jack silently sat, listening, watching, not trying to step in or steer the discussion.
Have to admit, I wasn’t used to a man being who he said he was. He’d promised that this time was for me to learn and explore.
“Enlightened” was the perfect word, actually. Because even my talk with Master Derek already left me thinking about certain aspects in a new light, in ways I hadn’t considered.
And while I still wished Jack would attend the first class with me, I grudgingly admitted it made sense for me to go alone.
Hell, I made it through medical school and dissecting cadavers. A BDSM 101 class should be a breeze, right?
When we finished our talk with Master Derek, we headed to our room which was on the ground floor. I looked around and tried not to gawk at the variety of people I saw during our trek through the lobby, everything from “normal” looking people to adults dressed as babies, and everything in between.
I tried not to be judgmental but I’d already formed one determination.
“I’m not an adult baby,” I told him once the room door swung shut behind us. “That’s a hard no for me. Nothing against them, but that’s definitely not me.”
He set the keycard on the table. “There, you see?”
“See what?”
He gathered my hands in his and kissed them.
Did I mention it melted me when he did that?
“You’ve already defined a hard limit,” he said.
“That sounds too easy.”
He smiled. “It can be that easy. I know that I’m not a heavy sadist, but I want something more than a ‘Daddy/Little girl’ dynamic. If you were to decide you wanted to explore being a Little, I would support you doing that, but that would be a separate aspect of our relationship outside of our main dynamic. Does that make sense?”
I stared up at him. “Nothing makes sense in my mind right now.”
“Fair.” He pulled me in for a forehead kiss and can I just say how is thatnotknown asthesexiest thing ever? “Like Derek said, labels are just that. I can call you ‘girl’ or ‘submissive’ or ‘Daddy’s little fucktoy’ and that is something we decide together, but it’s not the sum of what we do together. Doesn’t even have to be the same as what someone else does. In fact, I guarantee you it won’t be.”
I stared up at him, struggling not to grind against him.
Okay, yeah, that last one?Daddy’s little fucktoy?As wrong as it sounded…
Yeah. It was hot ashell.
His gaze narrowed, his head cocking. “What just happened, baby?”
I swallowed, not sure how to say it, embarrassed to admit it.
He dipped his knees, bringing us eye-to-eye. “Daddy’s… little… fucktoy,” he whispered.
Yes, Iwhimpered, okay?
A slow smile spread across his face and he nuzzled his nose against mine. “Does my girl like it when I call her ‘Daddy’s little fucktoy’?”
I whimpered again,reeeealllywishing he’d quit saying it, because every time he did, it made my pulse race and my clit throb and I’d packed a finite number of panties for the weekend.
Hopefully, they had laundry service here.
