"Another supervised outing?"
"No, it’s meant to be another nice meal with my...with Enzo."
"You were going to say boyfriend," Jessica notes. "Why won't you just call him your boyfriend? What’s the big deal about it?"
Because I don't know exactly what we are.
I owe him a debt, and apparently, I’m a problem of his to manage. Whether that makes him my boyfriend seems like the least important question.
"It's complicated," I repeat with a laugh.
Sarah throws up her hands. "Everything's complicated with you now."
"I'm sorry I'm not the simple, uncomplicated friend you remember."
"That's not what I meant—"
"Isn't it? You came here expecting to find the old Maddie, living some Instagram-perfect life. But that's not reality. Reality is messy and complex and sometimes scary."
"Are you admitting it's scary?"
I hadn't meant to say that.
"Life is scary," I deflect. “Especially when you move to a new country all alone.”
"Your life doesn't have to be. It certainly wasn’t scary before you came to Sicily.”
"Maybe I'm okay with a little fear if it comes with everything else."
"Everything else being what? A house you can't live in? A boyfriend you can't be honest about? A life you can't share with your best friends?"
Each point hits like a small wound.
"You don't understand," I say quietly.
"Then help us understand. Please, Maddie. We love you. Tell us the truth."
"I can't."
"Can't or won't?"
"Both."
The admission hangs between us. Sarah's face shifts from frustration to genuine concern.
"Maddie, if you're in trouble—"
"I'm not in trouble."
"If you want to leave—"
"I don't want to leave."
"Even though you can't tell us the truth about what's happening here?"
They both stare at me like I've lost my mind. Maybe I have.
"The car's waiting," I say. "Are you coming with me or not?"
