It’s Mia. Not Knox.
Instantly, I feel guilty for the disappointment. I’m always happy to hear from Mia. And honestly… I could use her voice right now.
Other than the quick text letting everyone know I landed safely in Tuscany, this is the first real moment since the wedding—and since she and I saw Knox withthatwoman—that I’ve spoken to anyone back home.
I swipe to answer. “Hey.”
Mia doesn’t waste a second. “How are you holding up?” Her voice is soft and careful. The way she gets when she’s trying not to poke at one of my bruises.
A lump rises in my throat. “Well, I guess I’m… here. Here in Italy.”
“Oh, Isla. You sound terrible.” She sighs, and I imagine her shaking her head.
“I know.”
“Babe, tell me what’s going on. Did you speak to Knox about that woman?”
I stare out over the river, trying to compose my mind. “Yes and no.”
She huffs. “Isla, which is it?”
“A bit of both. I’m serious.” I draw in the cool air, hoping it will still my mind. “I might have asked him more about her, but we started arguing, and then…we, um, slept together.”
“Youwhat!” Something falls to the floor. It sounds like she knocked over a drink.
“Yeah. We had sex. A… lot.” I breathe out the last word, heat blooming through my body.
“Jesus, Isla.” Her voice cracks first, then she gasps. “That isn’t the kind of thing you tell me when I’m in between meetings or when I’m standing up. You could have at least made sure I was sitting.”
“I’m sorry.” I grip the railing tighter as a wave of dizziness threatens to take me.
“Don’t be. I’m being silly. You weren’t to know. Are you…okay?”
“No.” I bring a hand to my cheek and blink back tears. If I cry, it won’t be because I’m hurt. It’ll be because I let myself down. “I’m so stupid, Mia. And I keep making these foolish mistakes.”
“Is that what you think? That it was a mistake?” Typical Mia. Always seeing straight through me.
I pause to think about the question. To remember how I felt when I was with Knox. There was no part of me that didn’t want him. “No.” The confession hurts, but the truth feels freeing. “I don’t think it was a mistake.”
“I thought so.” She sighs. “Alright. Tell me everything you can. I have fifteen minutes.”
A shaky breath slips out of me as I gaze across the river. “Okay, here goes. You may want to sit, though. There’s more. More to do with Chad.”
Chair legs scrape against the floor on the other end of the line, followed by a muffled sound. “Fire away.”
I take another quick breath before I tell her everything. I even tell her about the encounters I had with Knox before our wedding night. By the time I’m done, I feel weak all over again.
“Holy shit, Isla. I’m actually speechless. That’s just too much.”
I nod, even though she’s not here to see me. “I guess I’m experiencing an out-of-the-frying-pan-and-into-the-fire situation. And it’s my fault.”
“No. Absolutely not. What happened between you and Knox is not your fault, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to allow you to blame yourself for Chad, too.” The fury in her voice ripples through the phone.
“My mind feels completely fucked.”
“I’d be surprised if it didn’t.” She laughs without humor. “Look, the solution to this is going to be down to you. What you want.”
“Do I really have a choice?”
