“Now what?” Iasked.
He shrugged and made a face as if to say it was my call. “What do you need for closure? Want to sell the place as is? Fix it up? Go home and pretend we nevercame?”
I sniffed and looked back into the bedroom. In a sense, I’d been pretending this place didn’t exist long enough. I’d treated it as a problem I’d get to one day when I had the strength. “I want Georgina, and she comes with Boston. So I need to be done withthis.”
“Then maybe it’s time to put it on themarket.”
Sell, sell, sell. That was what everyone kept telling me to do. The house wasn’t a home without Mom, Libs said. It didn’t serve any purpose but a painful reminder. Aaron would add that there was a profit to be made. But who was I withoutit?
Without amom?
Who would stop me from turning into the persona I’d crafted for myself? This stupid, sagging pile of bricks and memories was the only thing keeping me tied to my upbringing, my family, my childhood. It was the only thing rooting me to this earthanymore.
Thatwas the deeper—the more that Georgina had spoken of. By letting go of the house, I wasn’t just admitting Mom was dead. I was scared it meant the good parts of myself were gone too. That I’d no longer be able to take off the mask—I would becomeit.
“These are my roots,” I said to Justin. “This is who I really am. I’m afraid, now that I’m on my own, this is the only thing keeping me from becoming that guy in theexposé.”
“Wow, man. That’s heavy.” Justin blew out a sigh. “I get it. I really do. But it’s a lot to pin on a piece of real estate. Why do you have tobeanyone atall?”
I turned to him. “What do youmean?”
“You’re complicating things. Just be who youare.”
We had a saying at the office when brainstorming sessions or design concepts went off the rails—KISS.Keep it simple, stupid. From Quintanilla to Quinn, Boston kid to city playboy, I’d been trying to keep those parts of myself separate. To slip those identities on and off. But I wasstillthat punk who’d hustled to become the man I was now. I was both. Without Mom to put me back in my place when I needed it, I was clinging to this, an empty shell of a house. “I’m overthinking it,” Isaid.
“You’re never going to forget where you came from or where you’ve been. You’re not my friend conditionally, dependent on which Sebastian I’m getting. You’re just Sebastian, dude.” Justin folded his arms over his chest. “And I’ll bet Georgina sees you as one whole man, not inparts.”
The way George and Georgina existed only in her head. To me, she was just herself—strong, capable, sensitive, sweet, soft . . .kind.
Andmine.
If she’d still have me—as the man Iwas.
Opal strained against her collar until Justin released her. She galloped down the hall, jumping on me. I crouched and ruffled her fur as I glanced up at Justin. “That four-page spread on Valentine’s Day gift ideas for every type of sweetheart—think we can pushit?”
“Considering the issue after that will be March, I don’t think so.” Justin cocked his head. “But we could move some things around if we do it quickly.Why?”
“I need a few pages and some prime real estate on thecover.”
Justin shrugged. “Who’s going to stopyou?”
Nobody, that was who. I’d just faced off with the biggest obstacle in my path. Now that I’d confronted the house, I wanted to gohome.
27
Georgina
My new assistantwaved at me through the window of our conference room, and I motioned for her to comein.
“Countdown to the new guy’s first client pitch starts now,” Tonya said. “I’m making an office Dunkin’ run to keep him caffeinated. Wantanything?”
I clenched my jaw to stem the emotions that flooded over me whenever I thought of Sebastian. Not even moving hundreds of miles away could distance me from his ridiculous obsession with that place. Or from him. “No, thanks,” Isaid.
Who needed caffeine when you were fueled by the need to forget a brokenheart?
I was exaggerating a little. Things had been moving at a breakneck pace since I’d arrived in Boston—my job had been hectic, scary, and oddly fulfilling. It kept me busy, that was for sure, but it seemed there was always time to missSebastian.
I returned to the research I’d been compiling on a local TV station. It was currently succumbing to a shitstorm brought on by an opinionated, drunken weatherman. It was a beginner’s assignment, but I had about three people on my team I was still getting to know and had to decide who to put onit.
