Anything.
I desperately tried to maneuver my body so I could grasp his shoulders yet still keep some distance between us.
A loud laugh escaped him. “Just hold my damn shoulders and relax. I can’t see anything.”
My leg brushed against his as I held on to him, making sure to put a few inches between all our off-limit areas.
“Thanks,” I said, leaning back to look at the stars. “I miss how peaceful it is out here.”
“Yeah? It’s hard to beat, isn’t it?”
“It is.” I sighed before straightening my neck and looking into those sage green eyes. “Thank you for giving me a job and giving me an apartment and getting Wrax back for me. I really am grateful.”
“I know you are. And you’re helping me as much as I’m helping you. My books were a mess, and you’ve got everything running like a well-oiled machine.”
“Happy to help.” I nodded. “I felt like you were avoiding me tonight. Sometimes it seems like we’re back to normal, and other times I feel like you’re pulling away.”
“I’m just trying to stay in my lane, Wren.”
“What lane is that?” I asked.
“The one where we get our friendship back on track. Where I know that no matter where you are, we’re still connected.” He cleared his throat. “I can’t lose you again, Wren.”
It was honest and vulnerable, and I appreciated it.
“I can’t lose you, either.”
“So we’re on the same page,” he said, the corners of his lips turning up.
“Aren’t we always on the same page?”
“Yeah. So you’re here until the end of July? I haven’t wanted to push, but I want to know.” He blew out a breath. “I guess in a way, I need to know.”
“Wrax and I go to North Carolina at the end of July and will get back on our routine.” I lived at a training facility there, an all-inclusive equestrian center where many riders lived and trained.
“And do you feel good about going back?”
“Yes and no.” I pushed the hair back from his forehead because I wanted a better view of his eyes. Unfortunately, the slight change of position had my knee grazing his very eager erection. “Oh my gosh. Control that thing, Axel!”
“You’re practically naked in my arms, and you think my dick can just fake his feelings for you?” He laughed. “Answer the damn question. I feel like you’re holding back with me, and if you want me to put my guard down, you need to do the same. Come on, Horse Girl. It’s me.”
His words hit me right in the chest, and I adjusted my hands on his shoulders. Because it was him. I could trust him.
“Something shifted in me a few weeks before I came home,” I whispered.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I had that accident shortly after I won Worlds, and normally a disastrous showing would put a fire in me. But this was different.”
“How so?”
“It felt like a wake-up call. I’d just won this huge title, and then here I was lying on the ground with a few broken ribs and a bunch of scrapes and battle wounds, and I just didn’t know if I wanted to even get up,” I said, feeling a huge weight lift off my shoulders as the words left my mouth.
“That’s not like you,” he said, his voice quiet. “Maybe your gut is telling you something.”
“Yeah. It’s tricky. I’m in a good position to make the Olympic team, and that has always been the big goal, right?” I shook my head. “But I don’t feel excited or passionate about it. Not the way I should.”
“Do you think it’s because of the fall? Did it scare you?”
