Her fingers trace my jawline. “Maybe I don’t want what you think I deserve. Maybe I should get to choose for myself.”
“And you choose this? Me? After everything?”
“I’m still here, aren’t I?” Her smile could brighten up any room. A building. All of Chicago.
And Aurora’s right. Despite everything, she’s still here. She didn’t back out of our deal, even with the peril, lies, forced marriage, and the cold shoulder I’ve given her for days. She’s still here, gazing at me like I’m valuable.
I skim my thumb across her cheek. “You’re a terrible judge of character.”
“Maybe. Or maybe I’m exactly what you need.” She leans closer, her lips nearly brushing mine. “Someone who sees the man behind the monster.”
I should tell her there is no man behind the monster. That what she sees is a projection, a fantasy she’s created to cope withher situation. I should let her know that I’ll only disappoint her and drag her down into my darkness with me.
Instead, I kiss her.
Unlike the chaste, impersonal kiss from the ceremony, this one is raw. Ravenous. Desperate. A silent confession. A promise I don’t know if I can keep. Her eager mouth opens against mine as she matches my intensity with her own.
The dress slips away. My hands find bare skin, warm and soft under my calloused palms. She arches into my touch, and the small moan that escapes her throat sparks every nerve in my being.
We break apart, panting. I press my forehead to hers, searching for a way to describe the riot of emotions she’s unleashed.
Nothing seems adequate.
“Alexei.” My name on her lips is a salvation I don’t deserve. “Make love to me.”
Those four little words swamp me with a tsunami of pure desire.
I lift her easily, her body fitting against mine as if we’re made for each other. The wedding dress lies abandoned on the floor, a discarded cocoon from which miraculous new life has emerged.
Hope. The belief that we might actually stand a chance of surviving in this fractured world we inhabit.
Together.
As I carry her toward the bed, I pledge a silent oath. A deep, binding promise.
I will protect her and be worthy of her. I will never let her regret choosing me, choosing this life.
Even if it kills me.
Chapter 39
Aurora
My heart slams against my ribs as Alexei cradles me against his chest and carries me to the bed. I’m still half-dressed in the ridiculous bridal lingerie. The corset cinches my ribs, and the garters pinch my thighs. With every step, my stomach drops like I’m plummeting from a ten-story building.
This is really happening.
My wedding night…with a mobster.
He lowers me onto the mattress with a gentleness that’s far more perilous than any violence. His eyes never leave mine. Perhaps he’s waiting for me to bolt like a frightened animal.
That analogy seems close to the mark. I’m a creature caught in a trap of my own creation, my fight-or-flight response screaming through every nerve ending.
Except I don’t want to flee or fight. Not anymore.
“There are still bobby pins in your hair.”
“So many bobby pins.” I reach up without thinking. “I’m pretty sure they used fifty boxes. I feel like a pincushion.”
