The kidnapping attempt. Phoenix must have told them. Or maybe it was just public knowledge in the way that thingsseemed to be in small communities. I looked back at my sad looking friend. “Would you be okay with that?”
I didn’t know how Sam’s family was going to keep their secret, but Jadon had offered. He must think it possible.
She nodded. “I’d be grateful. I could work somewhere or whatever.”
“Don’t worry about that.” Carl took a step toward us. “You’d be our guest. Our mother loves guests. She’ll fuss over you, and we have three little sisters. They’re going to decide you are their personal friend, there specifically for them to love on you. Please. Come stay with us. If you don’t like it, we can figure something out for you. The point is you’re safe and whatever is happening to you—that I think is similar to what is happening to Alatheia?—we can help. I promise.”
After a second, she nodded and cleared her throat. “If you’re sure I won’t be trouble.”
“No trouble at all.” Sam nodded. “Come on. Let’s go. I think it’s not going well here right now. We can let them get back to their family.”
She stepped toward him. “Lots of big families here.”
“Yes, we’re very… family oriented around this lake.” Sam patted Phoenix on the shoulder.
It wasn’t until I heard the door click behind them that I let out a breath. “I didn’t mean to get her here. I didn’t mean to potentially expose everyone.”
Jeremy hugged me. His familiar smell, particularly after what we had done earlier, surrounded me like a blanket. “Of course you didn’t. This will be fine. It’s not like people from the outside don’t come here. I mean, we didn’t grow up here and haven’t been here in years, but yeah, I know they do. They’ll take care of this. Maybe she can be trusted with it. I don’t know. You’re fine. No one is upset with you though.”
“I’m glad she’s safe.” Phoenix ran a hand through my hair. “That was weighing on you. I know they’re all weighing on you.”
Clean and sober Phoenix was maybe the most empathetic person that I’d ever known. He told me once he worried about everything all the time. I could see it now. He really felt things in a big way and did worry. His granny was going to leave us soon and he was thinking about how I felt about Sally and the others.
Julian patted Barrett on the arm. “Looks like you won the role of public boyfriend.”
“One of us was always going to have to. How do you think it ended up Kit?” He shrugged. “Tends to be the oldest.”
Jeremy shook his head, letting me go. “I’m not accepting it’s automatically you. Just so you know. For this, fine. We’ll see how it goes going forward.”
Phoenix sighed. “I think we can shelve this for today. We have a million big problems. This can wait.”
He was right. But Sally’s arrival was both a gift and a curse at the moment. Only time would tell how it ended up.
15
Dina’s voice startled me out of the near daze I had been in for hours.
“No, my darling, I’m not arguing. He does look just like you did at that age.”
Who was she talking to? I looked around. She stared at the wall but not at any of us. What was happening?
Eric sighed, rubbing his eyes. “This is normal.” His voice was low. “Sometimes people, toward the end, they see their departed loved ones.”
“Really?” Phoenix widened his eyes from where he sat across from me. “Why?”
“Well, we don’t know why.” Eric sunk into a chair. “Maybe it’s something happening in her brain or maybe she is, indeed, seeing the people she loved who have moved on. I am not really in a position to say.”
Dina’s helper, who I’d discovered was a hospice nurse among other things, fussed with her blanket before leaving her and slipping out of the room.
Everyone was seated now, and Kit shook his leg, looking left and right. Daniel put his arm around his older brother, whichstopped the movement. I had never seen Kit when he didn’t seem like he was in control of the room. This had to be throwing him for a loop. Or at least I imagined it was. I had found my mother dead.
I really never thought about that. My father had died—and I didn’t know the circumstances surrounding it—and my mother I had found dead. I blinked. This was absolutely not the first time I had been around death. I just never let myself think about that aspect of it. The before and the after, that was how I existed. Only I had a before, and an after, and an actual moment where the two existences had collided. Right that fucking second. Why did I never think about that?
Dr. Trevor was right. I really didn’t deal with my trauma. Ever. And I certainly wasn’t going to deal with it now.
“No, I am so glad to see you.” She laughed gently at something. “When there were four of them, I knew you guys were with me then. Four boys. That had to be your doing. Your personal wink that you had never really left me.”
I turned toward Barrett who I sat right next to and took his hand in mine. He was silent. I wasn’t sure he was even seeing his grandmother in that moment. It was like he was present with us but not really present. He squeezed my fingers, bringing our joined hands to his mouth so he could kiss my palm. It was a relief when he did that. I wasn’t sure where he had gone, but it couldn’t have been any place good. Barrett carried the emotional burdens of his entire family, mostly silently. He and Phoenix were bookends to the twins, each one shouldering things in the ways that they could manage.
