“Dee, wait,” Colt calls out, but I don’t stop.
I need to be away from this house.
Shifting my weight, my right crutch slips, and before I can stop it, I’m falling. My breath catches in my throat, bracing for the sharp sting of impact—
But strong arms wrap around me, catching me just in time.
Colt.
We tumble together, and he twists his body, shielding me as we hit the grass. I land on top of him, cushioned by his chest, his arms locked tight around me like a safety net I didn’t knowI still had. The moment we stop moving, the tears come—hard and fast.
I was stupid to think I could manage the stairs on my own.Reckless. If Colt hadn’t caught me, I could have undone everything, set my recovery back weeks, broken something else. But I had to get out. I couldn’t stay inside that house one second longer—not with that goddamn vacancy sign flashing, not with my family inside laughing and planning a future I’ll never get to live.
“What were you thinking?” Colt demands, urgency laced in his voice as he lifts us to a seated position in the grass. “Are you okay? Did you hurt anything?” His hands frame my face, thumbs brushing away tears that keep falling anyway.
I can’t speak.
I look into his eyes—those eyes that always see straight through me—and cry.
“I can’t be in there,” I finally choke out, my voice barely a whisper.
He glances over his shoulder toward the house, brows drawing together. “What? Why?” he asks, shifting me into his lap, holding me like I might break apart if he lets go.
“Because…” My breath hitches, heart racing so fast I can’t breathe right. “Because it’s a house that should be full of children, Colt. And I can’t…”
The rest won’t come.
I can’t get the words out around the sobs wracking my chest.
Colt doesn’t say anything. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me in tighter, pressing me to his heart like he’s trying to slow mine down with his own. I curl into him, the pain too big, too raw, and I rock back and forth in his hold, salt burning my eyes, his shirt soaking up every shattered breath.
“Dee…” Colt’s voice is soft, breaking through my sobs like sunlight through storm clouds. “I thought you were feelingbetter about the whole baby thing?” He kisses the top of my head as if that alone could glue me back together.
But I’m splintering.
I shake my head and grip his shirt in my fists, crumpling the fabric like it’s the only thing keeping me tethered. The world tilts under me. My insides twist. It feels like the earth is opening up beneath me, ready to swallow me whole, and maybe I want it to. Because at least then I wouldn’t have to feel this undeniable agony.
“I’m sorry,” Colt murmurs, arms tightening around me. “I thought being home would help. I didn’t realize it would make you feel like this.” He presses another kiss to my temple, rocking me gently. “Where do you wanna go, baby? Anywhere. Just say the word. I’ll take you. I’ll carry you if I have to. Just tell me how to help.”
God, he’s so good.
I don’t deserve him.
He’s too good for me.
He’d burn the world down to ease my pain. But this isn’t a pain he can fix.
This is our home.
Our dream.
And now it’s a constant reminder of everything I’ll never give him.
I shake my head again, burying myself deeper into his chest. He seems to get it that I don’t want to go anywhere, but I also don’t want to feel like this anymore.
He exhales slowly, then gently lifts my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. I must look like hell. My eyes are puffy, my nose is running, and I’m hiccuping through every damn breath. But his eyes don’t waver.
He sees me.
