“You remember it all?”It was phrased as a question, but also a whispered statement.
“I do.I can even remember how his blood tasted.The salt of the sea.The umami of seaweed and mushrooms.And yet he was sweet as candy, too,” Grayson answered and rubbed his hands up and down his arms.
Grayson leaned his hip against the fountain’s edge and stared down at his reflection.He did not remember what he looked like.Not really.Only in parts.Fangs.Silver eyes.Parted lips.And the flame within him to wield armies as easily as a swordmaster did a blade.
“Do you miss him?Do you want me to get Kaito?”Ryder asked softly.
“I want him and Nero and Dani.I want to hold them to me.To feed them from me.I want…” Grayson gritted his teeth.
Dani had just left them not an hour ago and he missed her desperately.Suddenly, he missed his whole Bloodline.
Ryder took both of Grayson’s hands in his own.“You will have all you want.But tell me to go and I will bring you whatever you desire.Whether it is people, planets, flowers… whatever you want.”
Grayson kissed Ryder until he could not breathe.He kissed him until he did not know where he ended and Ryder began.His lips were numb and swollen when they broke apart.Both were still panting.Both were still wanting.
“Balthazar has both gifts,” Grayson whispered.
“Yes,” Ryder answered and became very still.
“Do you remember when we flew together?”Grayson asked.
“I do.”
“What if I could fly wingtip to wingtip with you?”Grayson asked.“For real?”
Ryder rested his forehead against Grayson’s and rocked their bodies together.“I would love that.But…”
“But?”Grayson’s eyes flickered upwards.
Ryder was looking at him so lovingly, but seriously too.“But I understand if I cannot be your choice as Master.”
“Ryder, I–”
“No, Grayson, I must say this.I must.”Ryder closed his eyes tightly.“Iwantto turn you back to yourself.I do not say to be your Master or to have you as my fledgling.Because that will not be our relationship.”
Grayson gazed upon him.
“You are the heart in my body,” Ryder said and when he smiled his eyes were filled with tears for a moment.
“Ryder,” Grayson breathed.
“It is just the truth I speak,” Ryder said.“But, though you are my heart, I know that I am your arm.Your sword arm.”
“You make that sound small, and you are more than that to me–”
“You are the General.I am your Soldier.We are more than that to each other, but I know, you willalwaysbe the General,” Ryder said, but he was smiling, not upset by this.“And that means, you will do what you must do to protect us and our king.”
“Ryder, what I want–”
“I know.”Ryder held him close.“And if it is the right thing, we will do it.I will bring you across and it will be amazing.But if it needs to be someone else that changes nothing between us.”
Grayson closed his eyes.No, it doesn’t.Because I love you and only you.
“It is they that would be the one that would be shortchanged,” Grayson said.“I am not going to be a Childe.Not even like Balthazar is to Caemorn.Though, by the gods, that is a beautiful and strange thing!”Grayson couldn’t help but smile.“You said that you are my sword arm, but you are my everything.The one person who could pull me from my single focus.From my cold precision.From the ruthlessness that I feel inside of me sometimes.Isn’t that Caemorn warned you of in regards to me?We all thought he was cold.But that is not true.He is warmth itself when let in.But I…”
“Grayson, you are–”
“I can lose myself in the strategy.In the plans.I sometimes forget thehumanequation unless it is because I wish to use it to my advantage,” Grayson admitted.
