Panic came off Bailey in waves, but not because she didn’t want to marry me. It had much more to do with the lack of clothing and the fact that we were being ambushed.
“Now would be a really good time for you to share your blanket with me,” I hissed.
“They may say for better or for worse, but this is definitely one of those times I will be breaking that vow,” she murmured out of the side of her mouth.
I had literally nothing to cover myself with, and since my clothes were scattered in the other room, I couldn’t even get in there without everyone seeing way too much of me.
I glanced out the window just in time to see more vehicles pull up. People from all over town had come to witness this disaster, and they were about to get an eyeful.
I was about to rip the blanket, just to give myself the smallest shred of dignity, when I saw various boards leaning against the wall under the window. It would not be the most comfortable thing, and risking splinters so close to the family jewels was not a happy thought. However, walking out there in absolutely nothing just wouldn’t do.
Grabbing Bailey by the shoulders, I shifted her to the right until I could snag two decent-sized pieces and properly cover both my front and back side.
“This is not really happening, right?” Bailey said over her shoulder.
“She’s your mother.”
“Come, come!” Georgia rushed over, grabbing both of us by the arm.
Her eyes drifted to my backside and a pleasant humming sound left her throat, but I pretended to ignore it even though it felt like ants were climbing over every inch of my body.
“Really, if you’d just let me put on pants?—”
“I think we’ve all waited long enough for the two of you to finally make this official,” Georgia grinned.
“But it’s not even real! We don’t have the paperwork,” Bailey contested.
“Oh, but you’ll be making a promise before God, and I know neither of you would dare back out on such a sacred vow,” she said pointedly.
“I wouldn’t back out anyway.”
“Really?” she quirked an eyebrow at me. “Because I seem to recall you sleeping with my daughter and then destroying her heart.”
I didn’t have anything to counter that, so I turned to Pastor O’Donnell. “Where do we stand?”
“Uh…right here—there! Not too close.” Flustered, he wiped his brow as he opened his bible. “Now, where to begin…”
“There’s a hundred in this for you if you make this quick,” I whispered.
“This is so embarrassing,” Bailey whispered.
“At least you have a blanket wrapped around you. I’m holding up two pieces of wood!”
“Dearly beloved,” he started, wiping the sweat from his brow despite the frigid temperatures, which were rapidly getting worse with the door open.
“Speed it up, Pastor.”
“Uh…Do you, Bailey, and you, Liam, promise to honor, love, respect…yada, yada, yada?”
“Did he just yada, yada, yada our vows?” Bailey hissed.
“We do,” I said, nudging her in the ribs.
“Right, we do,” she agreed. “Til death do us part.” She leaned in. “Or when I kill you.”
“I have no doubt it will be sooner rather than later.”
“Good, then before God…and the rest of the town, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
Grinning at Bailey, I turned to her, but at her challenging look, I knew there was only one way forward. Dropping both boards, I pulled her into my arms and kissed the hell out of her.
Gasps and town gossip be damned.
