Truth is; I’d like a do-over for tonight.Let’s wipe the slate and do everything differently.Maybe I’ll change my mind about attending the dinner altogether, and stay here all night having fun with Oscar.
“What’s the matter with you?Why’s it so difficult to admit something happened between us?”She pushes me, and my back hits the mirror.
“Kira, I’m gay.Nothing good will come of this.”
Her blonde hair falls around her face.“Do you have any idea how many times you’ve mentioned that fact tonight.Who is it you’re so desperate to convince?Why does the label even matter?I thought freedom to be who you are, whoever you are, is what you were all for.”
She’d understand if she knew anything at all about me, but people don’t, not even my so-called super fans.Some shit, you just don’t put out there.Some of it is impossible to translate onto the page.Mostly though, I prefer not to dwell in those dark moments.“Go home, Kira.You did your job admirably.You kept me out of trouble.I’ll make sure Howard knows that.”
She sucks on her top lip, considering.
“Please.”
“Fine,” she snaps, reaching an abrupt decision.“I’ll go, but you…you’re a piece of work, Dylan Drake.”
“I am,” I agree, as that seems easiest.
I lock the door behind her and put the chain in place too.The shower’s beckoning, as is the bed, but I don’t move from the door.I count to fifteen, but fail to summon any sense of calm.
You need to wash her from your skin.
Get her out of your head.
I unfasten my fly, let my trousers fall.I peel down my underwear too, and still I don’t take a single step towards the bathroom.My cock is perky.Not hard as such, but definitely desperate to feel a clasp around it.
If I come it’ll make it all better is what I tell myself.What I repeat over and over, even while I acknowledge that it’s an outright lie.
An orgasm won’t make it better.Not if that means pumping my stuff into the open air.I want to come buried deep inside her body.
And why the fuck would you want to do that?
There’s a simple answer and a horribly complicated one.I don’t specifically think about either.Instead I focus on walking to the bedroom.Stowed inside my otherwise empty suitcase is what appears to be an oversized toiletries bag.It’s completely plain, nondescript.Inside there are four items; condoms, lube, a leather strap that serves as a cock ring, and a huge fucking dildo with a sucker on the bottom.
I take no delight in what I’m about to do.This is about necessity.Clarity.It’s a cleansing ritual.
I go into the bathroom, leaving the lights off, then secure the dick at the right height upon the tiles.My dark shadow moves across the mirror.I don’t look at it.Once the condom and lube are dealt with, I kick off what remains of my clothing, then get my cock nice and hard.The strap ensures it stays that way.
He’s in my head as I push back against the enormous dick.It’s difficult to take, my hole resists my best efforts even after all these years, but there’s no let up.No changing my mind or backing away.It’s a dark place I’m going to, but at the end of it there’s light and a peace of sorts.
This is what you like, eh boy?Your mamma told me all about you.That what you really like is a big dick spearing you in the arse.Well look what I’ve got for you right here.
I keep on pushing back.Pushing and pushing.Waiting for that moment when he’s inside me and it’s impossible to do anything but exist in a single space.It’s always over quickly.I always come, because he’s right, I do crave what he offers at least in some sense.Afterwards, when I’m soiled with two sets of spunk, that’s when the blows come raining down, and I’ll lie there and I’ll take them and won’t feel a thing.
Only, my body doesn’t cooperate with the plan.My masturbation aid slips and slides against my skin.No amount of pressure or guidance convinces it to penetrate where it’s supposed to go.I keep seeing Kira right before me, Kira watching me, with a frosty smile on her soft lips.Steely determination is mixed with pity, desire, and revulsion in her eyes.I straighten from my bent position.Upright, I press back against the cold unyielding tiles, loosen the strap keeping me stiff.With her image shimmering before me, I don’t need it.
I should have taken her while she was here.Tumbled her onto the bed and buried my face in her cunt.I’ve no experience of what that would be like, but a fertile imagination.There’s no doubt in my mind that’s where she wanted me to end the night.I want to fuck her hard, until we’re both sticky with sweat and barely able to move anymore.I want to sleep with her cuddled against my side.
I stumble through the suite in the dark still naked until I locate my phone.While I don’t have her number, I do have a line straight to her boss.
DD: Get Kira back here now.
Here’s the thing about Howard Falchard.He’s a no nonsense kind of guy, which is why I don’t get any bullshit back demanding to know why, or if I require rescuing.If that were the case, that’s the text message I’d have sent.
HF: ETA 2 mins.
I don’t bother to dress.I do deal with the shit in the bathroom.When her knuckles rap against the door, I’m still on my knees zipping up the case.Having ascertained it is her, via the peep hole, I undo the various locks and let her in.
She’s still sans shoes, but the lack of height doesn’t matter as she aims low and her fist hits square in the centre of my solar plexus.
