Gabriel, stares deeply into Pierre’s eyes, for a moment then says in a roughened voice, “I promise to love you, and no matter what else happens in our lives, I will always put you first.”
There’s a moment of hushed emotional silence, then, Brandon moves forward, oboe ready.
It’s what I’ve been waiting for all afternoon.
Again, he does that funny little move, wetting the reed in his mouth then pulling it out, like a lollipop. He waits until he has complete quiet, then starts.
Unlike the music he played in church, two weeks ago, this is a renaissance piece, sweet and light and fits the forest perfectly. It starts slow, like a sway of dandelions in the breeze, and gradually gathers pace and animates into a cheerful melody. The sound of the oboe is clean, like fresh air; I can feel myself smiling. It even draws smiles from the rest of the wedding guests; everywhere I glance, people look happy, their feet tapping. When it comes to an end, like a swoop of birds coming home and settling on a branch, my heart is full of joy, I could dance.
Gabriel dips his head and kisses his bride. A kiss that goes on for so long, I think they’ve forgotten they’re being watched by nearly a hundred guests.
I let out a silent sigh. Silent because I don’t want anyone to guess my feelings. Watching two people in love like this makes me wonder if this is something I will ever get one day.
All my energy over the last few weeks, ever since I felt my baby move, I’ve been trying not to blame Clive, not to give up on us. It’s getting harder, because…because surely Clive is trying to make the world a better place, and I want our baby to be born into a better world. But today, watching Pierre and Gabriel, I can’t help the question in my heart.
Will I ever have a man who puts me first, no matter what?
At the centre of the clearing, Gabriel breaks the kiss but still holds his bride’s face in his hands, and they stare into each other’s eyes.
There are tears falling down my face, so many tears I have to use my scarf to mop them up.
???
On the walk home, Brandon points to the trees. “Look, Spring is coming.”
He’s right; the branches are knobbly with buds, and small birds hop around on the ground searching for seeds or something. A flash of colour behind the trees catches my eyes before it quickly disappears. A red dress. I crane to look but can see nothing.
We continue walking, but now I’m alert to it, I do hear a rustle of hesitant footsteps. A little later, as we get to the arched bridge at the start of Catcher Lane, the trees thin out and I suspect whoever is following us might be too shy.
“Keep walking,” I say to Brandon. “I’ll just be a sec.”
He gives me a puzzled look but keeps walking. I wait until he’s gone over the bridge then I retrace my steps into the line of the trees, and sure enough there’s that flash of red. This time it doesn’t disappear.
“Did you like the music today?” I ask as casually as possible so as not to frighten her.
After a moment, she steps out from behind a cedar, her face a mix of eagerness and fear.
“It was very different from the Christening, don’t you think?”
She nods several times, as if she wants to say,yes, yes, yes.
“Which did you like best?” I ask, taking a careful step closer.
She doesn’t answer, and it crosses my mind that she might not be able to talk. So, I answer the question for myself. “I loved the piece today, just perfect for a wedding. It made everyone smile.”
A wide grin breaks on the woman’s face. And she nods three times again.
“But the slow piece in the church was beautiful in a different way. Like a dream.”
This time it’s her who takes a couple of steps towards me. And her eyes search my face for something else. Something she wants and doesn’t know how to ask. So, I take a chance.
“Would you like to hear him play again?”
Her eyes widen and her face is eager.
“Why don’t you come to our house and meet him?”
A mistake. She freezes, alarmed.
