As harsh as the words were which Aunt Felicity, Uncle Henry, and Cousins Henry, Debby, and Roger said to me when we first met them, I see now that they were nothing but the truth. I was but a spoilt child on the path to ruination, and I cared not that my ruin would have meant that my sisters would have to partake in it.
Now I can see that I have been a selfish being all my life, in practice and principle. As a young child I was not taught what was right, due to my demanding such, I was allowed to ignore my education, and I was not taught to correct my temper. I was not given good principles, and led to believe that I could dowhatever I wanted. Yes, I was spoilt by Mama, who allowed, encouraged, almost taught me to be selfish and uncaring. I believed I could have whatever of my sisters’ property I desired, even though it was only because they had it and I did not. I thought meanly of all the rest of the world; that everyone should bow down to my desires.
Hence, when I was slapped and spanked, and then told that for some reason I was not allowed to touch any property belonging to Lizzy or take anything belonging to my other sisters, it was a great shock to me, but as Mama still supported me and our father never demanded I change, I learnt nothing other than to keep out of Lizzy’s chamber and not to take my sisters’ things.
At this school, I have finally learnt about my own insignificance in the world and that the way I behave not only affects me, but all of those around me. At last, I know that the world does not revolve around my whims and wants. It has not taken as long to wake up to that fact as it did from the time Copernicus theorised the earth revolved around the sun until it was widely accepted as fact after Kepler and Bradley in 1725. (Yes, I am attentive to my lessons and have discovered I have a particular interest in science, and especially astronomy.)
Allow me to beg the pardon of all of you in the family for all of my spoilt, improper, uncouth, and selfish actions over the years. I need to make special amends to Mama for the disgusting things I said to her when I was taken away to school. The only one I do not apologise to is Father.
I can see now that he used my bad behaviour to amuse himself. Unlike Mama who acted from love, like I used to do, our father cares for none other thanhimself. I beg your pardons for being harsh towards our father. I know what the 5th commandment says, but I cannot respect a man who has never cared about the welfare of his wife and daughters unless he could gain some selfish pleasure from it.
I no longer deny facts. I saw far more than I would allow myself to own at the time.
My prayer is that I will earn the privilege to come home at Christmastide, but I will bow to Mrs Gilbert’s judgement in that.
With all my love and praying you see my contrition is sincere,
Lydia
Fanny was not the only one crying at the end of the letter, all of the ladies present were. The tears were a mixture of joy, relief, and gratitude for the changes in the youngest Bennet.
“I will write to the headmistress and request Lyddie be allowed to attend Mary’s wedding. They have not announced a date yet so it will be some weeks from now, so Mrs Gilbert will be able to see if the changes in my baby are real,” Fanny said after she had wiped her tears away. “I believe it is genuine, but I do not see her daily. I will also write to Lydia. She needs to be prepared for the changes regarding my husband and where we now live.”
“That is a good idea, Fanny. The headmistress will not object to the request if you are leaving it to her discretion,” Henry opined.
“We too will write to Lyddie,” chorused the four Bennet sisters.
Her face beaming with pleasure, Fanny stood and made her way to her sitting room where her writing materials were. Less than two hours later a groom took the letters, includingthose from Lydia’s sisters, into Meryton to be sent by express.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
In the month since the assembly, the relationship between the four unengaged couples had only strengthened. A fortnight previously, Richard and de Bourgh had requested courtships with Elli and Charlotte respectively, and a sennight later, Andrew Fitzwilliam made the same request of Jane, who agreed without reservation.
When the letter with the news reached them, Lord and Lady Matlock’s joy could not be contained. They had worried that their sons would never find ladies to excite their attention, and now thanks to their friendship with Henry Bennet bringing them to the area, both sons were courting women who the Earl and Countess could not have approved of more.
Just after Jane accepted her viscount’s offer for courtship, Mary and Roger announced that they would marry on the final Saturday in November, which also happened to be the last day of that month. As excited as Fanny was about the upcoming wedding, she tempered her exuberance and reminded herself it would be Mary and Roger’s day, not her own.
Two days past a letter from Mrs Gilbert, the headmistress of Lydia’s school who Fanny had written to again as soon as the date for Mary’s wedding was known, was received. In it she stated that Lydia’s changed behaviour and attitude were very real, and she saw no reason why the youngest Bennet could not attend the wedding.
As Lydia had been informed of the engagement and courtships, rather than express jealousy in her letters, she had been effusive in her good wishes for all of the couples involved. She had expressed sorrow that Mr Bennet had attempted to hurt them, but pleasure that she would never see him again. She had opined that the punishment he received fit the crime.
Elizabeth was beyond happy for her sisters, one to be married soon and another being courted. She felt envy, but no jealousy. Over the month or so she had known him, she had discovered that William Darcy was exactly the man who, in disposition and talents, would most suit her. His understanding and temper, though unlike her own, would answer all her wishes. It was a union that would be to the advantage of both; by her ease and liveliness, his temperament would be softened, his manners improved; and from his judgement, information, and knowledge of the world, she would receive benefits of great importance.
She was teetering on the precipice of love, had possibly taken the plunge already, and wished that William would, if his desire matched hers, speak soon. She could not speak as it was the man’s prerogative to do so, but perhaps she could give some hints and remain within propriety.
On this particular morning, although cold, it was clear with nary a cloud in the brightening sky. There was almost no breeze to make the cold cut into one’s body. Hence, Elizabeth decided that it was a good day to ride to Oakham Mount.
A groom and one of Richard’s footmen—he had allowed them to serve at Netherfield Park and Longbourn while he was in the area—Brian Johns, escorted Elizabeth as she galloped across the fields on Aphrodite. When they arrived at the base of Oakham Mount, Elizabeth felt a frisson of pleasure when she saw Zeus near the foot of the path; his owner nowhere to be seen. She hoped he was on the summit as he knew of her habit to ride there when the weather allowed it.
Johns went up ahead of Miss Lizzy. He saw the master’s cousin seated on a boulder on the eastern side of the hill. There was none other aside from him. Knowing that Mr Darcy was a man his master trusted with his life, Johns stood where he was and did not stop Miss Lizzy passing him and walking onto the top of the hill.
Darcy had been looking out to the east, hoping this would be a morning his dearest, loveliest Elizabeth would choose to visit the mount. It had been more than a fortnight now since he had known he was deeply in love with her.
As if sensing her, Darcy turned and there she was looking as beautiful as she had ever looked. He stood and walked towards her, meeting her in the centre.
“How I hoped you would be here,” Darcy said as he took her hands in his own, allowing the thumb of each hand to caress her knuckles which were under her warm, leather riding gloves.
“Why was that, William?” Elizabeth asked daringly.
