The café quiets as the evening wears on, the other patrons filtering out until it’s just the two of us. The dim lighting casts a soft glow over Monty’s features. I find myself watching him more than I intend to, caught up in the subtle curve of his smile and the way his eyes sparkle when he laughs.
As we step out into the night, the air is cool and crisp. The sky is a deep velvet dotted with stars. We walk slowly, neither of us in a hurry to end the evening. The streets are quiet, the city softened by the late hour.
“Thank you for tonight,” I say as we reach a small park near the museum. “It was... wonderful.”
Monty turns to face me, his expression warm and open. “The pleasure was all mine. Truly.”
We stop near a bench. The faint glow of a streetlight casts a soft circle of light around us. My heart thrums in my chest, but this time, it’s not nerves. It’s anticipation.
Monty takes a small step closer, his gaze steady and searching. “Pink... can I…?”
“Yes,” I whisper, my voice steady.
He leans in, and this time, I don’t freeze. I meet him halfway, my hands finding their way to his shoulders as his touch anchors me.
Our lips meet in a soft, tentative kiss, and the world seems to melt away. It is gentle and sweet, full of the promise of something new and wonderful. Monty’s hand rests lightly at the small of my back, grounding me in the moment as warmth blooms in my chest.
His lips are soft and tender. Brushing over me oh so tentatively. Almost cautiously. I was his first sexual partner, sothis is probably his first kiss. The realization of that is making me giddy. It makes me feel special. As if I am someone worth waiting for.
The kiss deepens. I press myself closer to his broad chest. The heat of his body seeps into mine. His hand on my back becomes more confident, more sure, but still so achingly careful. A support, not a restraint. An offering and not a demand.
I have never been kissed like this before. Some of the men who used me in the harem slobbered over me, but it was nothing like this.
Oh heavens, I’ve just realized. This is my first consensual kiss. I’m giving my first kiss to Monty, just as he is giving his first to me. This is a special moment, truly shared.
His first kiss. My first kiss. Our first kiss.
When we finally pull apart, Monty’s eyes search mine, his expression a mix of awe and joy.
“Was that okay?” he asks softly.
“It was perfect,” I say, my cheeks flushing with happiness.
He smiles, his face lighting up in a way that makes my heart soar. As we stand there beneath the streetlight, the night feels infinite, full of stars and possibilities.
Chapter twenty-one
Pink
This shower is so hot I’m probably going to lose a layer of skin. It feels good. But it is not washing away the feeling of being ripe. It is not even distracting from it. I’m simply ripe while standing under a scorching hot shower. There is no running away from the fact. Nowhere to hide. No way to even delay it.
I have never hated my stupid body more. Why must it insist on betraying me and putting me in this predicament?
I like Monty. I really, really like him. We are courting. We have been on two wonderful dates. We shared a truly magical first kiss. Whatever is blossoming between us is precious. However, in the normal course of things, I would not wish to have sex with him at this stage. It’s too soon.
A strange, derogatory sounding giggle bubbles out of me. In the normal course of things, I wouldn’t put out until my wedding night. But I’m no virgin and Monty is never going to marry me.
But none of that changes the facts. I am ripe, so I have to let him fuck me.
On the other hand, I don’t want to go back to him formally emptying me. That would be as awkward as hell. It would also put a distance between us that I do not want.
I sigh heavily as I turn the shower off. Too close to have sex without emotion, yet not close enough to want to do it without necessity.
I wrap a towel around myself. Sex without emotion? Who am I kidding? It has not been like that with Monty for a while now, if it ever was. He has always made me feel things.
So why am I in such a tizzy? Is it because my feelings for him have grown so intense, I know I won’t be able to hide them at all?
I wish Jade was here so I could talk things through with him. I miss him. I miss Red and Brodie too.
