If he is going clubbing or to a party, I wanna come. I need all the distractions I can find. Now I’ve uncovered Ned’s secrets, I’m going to go back to moping any second now. Dancing and music and sweaty bodies would be a perfect antidote. And I could see if I really have lost my allure or if it’s just Ned that is immune to my charm.
The vampire fixes me with a level stare. “To feed.”
Oh. My stomach swoops and the hairs on the back of my neck rise. Not a party at all. Something far darker. Far more dangerous. How intriguing.
“Are you going to kill someone? Do you need help burying the body?” I say, a little breathlessly.
Ned shakes his head wearily at me. “No and therefore, no.”
I’m a little disappointed. Burying a body would definitely be distracting. It’s not something I’ve ever done before. I’d probably throw up, but I’d be willing to try. I like helping my friends. I’m nice like that.
Wow. I really am very drunk, aren’t I?
Ned’s arm reaches out towards me. He is going to grab me, take me back to my room, and leave me all alone. All the things I don’t want.
“You could feed from me!” I blurt.
His dark eyebrows nearly disappear into his hairline. I suppose it is a rather unexpected offer, but I mean every word of it. It would be nice to be useful. To have something someone wants. To be wanted, even if it is only for the contents of my veins.
“Blue wouldn’t like it,” Ned says.
“Fuck Blue!” I say with surprising force. “He is not my mate anymore. He doesn’t want me so he doesn’t get to say jack shit about anything! He is nothing to do with me anymore!”
Ned’s dark eyes fill with sympathy. My face is wet. Fuck, I think I’m crying. He is never going to eat me now.
“Come on, let’s get you to your bed,” he says, confirming just how useless I am.
I’m so unwanted that not even a hungry vampire wants me.
“I taste bloody delicious!” I sob in outrage.
Ned takes my elbow and starts guiding me back to my room. My feet stumble after him. Traitors.
“You probably do,” he agrees. “You smell good.”
I turn my blurry eyes to him. A fragile hope beats in my chest. Did he just say what I thought he said? Is it true? Am I not so disgusting after all?
“You wanna eat me?” I ask out loud.
Please, please let someone want me. For any reason. I’d do absolutely anything for that. Anything at all. I just want one flipping person in the whole wide world to want me. Anyone. Please.
Ned sighs. “We aren’t going to talk about this while you’re drunk, Sammy.”
And damn if that isn’t just the nicest put down I’ve ever had. And that makes me cry even more.
Just like the pathetic, broken mess that I am.
Chapter twenty-four
Blue
“Blue!” Mal’s voice rings out and finds me huddled in the bottom of my pool.
I ignore it at first, but then realization hits me in waves. Gray’s mate is the whole reason Sammy lives here. He is why Sammy came into my life. Mal is Sammy’s adopted father. Mal has never sought me out before. So, this has to be about Sammy.
Gently, I shoo the shoal of fish off of my lap so I can swim to the surface. I find Mal waiting for me with his phone in his hand. The sun is beginning its slow descent down the sky. It’s getting dark earlier and earlier every day.
“One of my contacts has informed me that Sammy is being a twat.”
