Imagine your life being so straightforward that your biggest problem is arguing with your significant other in the middle of a furniture shop over which color sofa is best? It sounds alluring.Which it shouldn’t. But these damn mental images of living in domestic bliss with Gray won’t leave me alone.
A nice home. Waking up with him. Days full of simple chores. Nights full of mind blowing sex. No danger or drama. Just happy contentment.
I shake my head to clear it. I’m not that old, for fuck’s sake. And settling down with a demon is an absurd idea. I’ve seriously lost my mind.
Though, watching him excitedly investigate these chests of drawers, gives me the distinct impression that Gray would love to settle down. Hell knows he is old enough. And he has been through so much, he certainly deserves to.
Perhaps I can be the one to give him the life he craves? Maybe it is alright to admit to myself that I want it too? I know for sure that I’m tired of my current life. The glamor wore off long ago, and it has not been exciting for an age. Dealing with asshats like Nikolai is just a chore.
And I don’t need to do it anymore. I have enough saved up to live several lifetimes in comfort. There is no reason to keep going. Not now that I have someone in my life. Someone worth caring about.
Nevermind that he will despise me if he ever discovers what I am or what I have done to him. Those are dark secrets I can keep to myself. What he doesn’t know, can’t hurt him.
Gray spies something and scampers off. I follow behind and find him gleefully looking at curtains. The sight is making me smile like an idiot and I can’t stop it. I’m not even sure I care.
He looks a little odd with his hood up, and with the sunglasses I made him wear. But he is drawing far less attention than he would without them. He is just that stunning. People can’t keep their eyes off of him. And that’s not my possessive jealousy speaking. Okay, it’s not only my possessive jealousy speaking. He is genuinely good looking enough to draw people’s interest and scrutiny, and that is far too much hassle to deal with.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, scattering my thoughts. I pull it out and read the text. My mood darkens quicker than a tropical storm. Gray is by my side in an instant, looking up at me with anxious eyes.
“Sorry Little One, we are going to have to choose curtains another day, I have to go.”
Gray frowns. “Nikolai?” he asks.
I nod. There is not much more I can say to that.
Gray pouts but takes my hand and allows me to lead him towards the exit without a word of complaint, and suddenly, just like that, everything becomes clear.
A full on, life changing, flipping epiphany in the middle of a furniture store. On a weekday afternoon.
All my doubts, insecurities, and suspicions have fallen away. I know what I want, and fuck how it might look to anyone else, and fuck how ridiculous it is. I don’t want to be a dodgy gangster anymore. I don’t want to kill people or run drugs.
I want to choose curtains with Gray.
And now I know what I want, all the obstacles can go fuck themselves. I’m going to do my best to get it.
I let out a soft chuckle. I have an excellent track record in that regard.
I always get what I want.
Chapter twenty-three
Sleep releases me suddenly, and I wake with a gasp. The very first thing I register is that Gray’s hammock is empty. Is that what woke me?
A quick magic scan of the basement, house and grounds, tells me he is not on the property.
My heart is pounding. Where is he? Did he leave by choice? Is he okay?
My eyes close as I complete a thorough check of the wards. They haven’t been breached. There have been no intruders. Wherever Gray is, he wants to be there.
I roll out of bed to sit on the edge. Blindly, I reach for my cigarettes and light one. This moment definitely justifies a smoke. I take a long drag, but the nicotine isn’t doing anything for my state of mind.
Why did Gray leave? What is going on? Is he coming back?
He seemed happy last night. I let him blow me, and then I railed him hard. He’d fallen asleep in his hammock, sated and full. As far as I could tell.
Is he upset about something that happened earlier? He seemed to understand the need to abandon our shopping trip. I’d driven him back here, and I thought he was happy to hang out with the other boys while I went and dealt with Nikolai.
Gray had certainly greeted me with enthusiasm when I got back. I sensed no ill will or stroppiness from him.
