Trix said, “I have some cousins who can help. They’re very good at blending in or causing distractions, whatever you need.”
“Mob,” Jezebel coughed.
Trix frowned at Jezebel. “Not all Italians from New York are mob, Jez.”
“Oooh, Italians?” Felicia put in with shining dark eyes.
Jezebel pointed at her. “You’re already distracted and you haven’t even seen them.” Jezebel leaned forward, so she was at eyelevel with me. “I like what I’m hearing. I expected you tobe all self-sacrificing and dramatic, but instead you’re making it business, even if you are wearing that sweater.”
“It’s cute,” Minx said, elbowing Jezebel. “If you won’t wear it, at least someone will. We should all go shopping for matching hero costumes. Your assault suits are so boring.”
I shook my head. “I’m not a hero, and I need to get to work. I have a lot of scheming to do. I also have a therapy appointment. Felicia, could you help me get some documents? If I’m going to do this right, I need to know as much as possible.”
“What about Dirk?” Trix asked.
“What about him?” I tried to keep my voice light, but my heart pounded faster and faster while my mouth went dry.
“The less he knows, the better,” Jezebel said.
“He’s your husband,” Trixie pointed out. “He’s not going to just forget that someone tried to blow you up. You married him for his protection. He’ll feel guilty about his failure. He won’t be willing to give you space.”
Jezebel hissed. “That’s not his choice.”
I looked at Trixie and studied the new stitches in her forehead from the explosion. That was all on me. How could I have helped my family hurt others? No more. “He’s only with me so that he can take down my grandfather and cousin. I love him. I can guarantee his safety as long as my grandfather thinks that I’m playing his game, that I’m controlling Dirk, but I know that it’s just another desert mirage for him. I have until Christmas to wrap this up, otherwise, I don’t know how I’ll keep him close, keep him from being ruined. I don’t want to put any of you at risk. If you can see that it’s dangerous for you, I need you to say something and back out. You’re all brilliant women in various shades of deadly. I need your help to keep the people I care about safe, but you are all people I care about. Don’t risk yourself, whatever you do.”
Minx took my hand with a tremulous smile. “I’m so glad you’re taking care of Jezebel. She needs mothering.”
I was the least mothering person in the world, but I patted her hand, anyway.
“Wait,” Trixie said, still frowning. “You really think that Dagger only married you for vengeance?”
I shrugged helplessly. “He couldn’t like me when my family killed his sister.” It hurt to say that. Was I going to be sick? Maybe I would cry. My chest was so tight, and my eyes ached just to close forever, but I didn’t have time for that. I cleared my throat. “I admit that I am responsible for my part in my family’s legacy. I should have stopped Philippe before he destroyed any innocent lives.”
Jezebel sighed. “Well, honey, that’s noble and all to take responsibility for your failings, even when you weren’t aware of them, but you can’t control other people’s. Also, I don’t think Dirk is as concerned with vengeance as he is about you. I’ve got him hog-tied in a closet, because he refuses to leave until he sees you.”
I stood up, knocking over the glass of stuff in my rush. “He’s here? Why?”
Jezebel stood up slowly, her sharp eyes softening while I stood paralyzed, torn between the right and the want.
“He’s worried about you. If you don’t let him see you, and put on a good show of how well you’re doing, he’ll pamper you terribly in that horrible house of his. He’s protective of you, and unless I’m wrong, he has genuine feelings for you that are the furthest from hatred on the spectrum that you can get.”
I shuddered at the thought of Dirk loving me, actually loving me when I was so incredibly bad for him in every way. He had kissed me so long ago on the tower, but he’d learned his lesson, and he didn’t want me too close to him now, because he wasn’twilling to sell his body like I’d done with Clint. That’s why he wouldn’t sleep with me.
I squeezed my eyes shut. “You shouldn’t tell me that. I’m not capable of reason where he’s concerned. He’s what my body wants, what my soul has always wanted, and it’s going to kill me to let him go, but I will, because he deserves to be free. Every time he looks at me and my pink hair, he thinks of her, of what my family did.”
“I’ve said this already, but you aren’t your family,” she said softly and put a hand on my shoulder, a careful touch like you’d give a skittish horse.
I opened my eyes and looked into hers, soft, blue, so much pain and sacrifice in them. She could do absolutely anything if she believed that it was necessary- the ultimate supervillain or superhero depending on your perspective, but I wasn’t that strong.
“I was, but I won’t be anymore.”
“Good,” Trix said, draping her arms over both of us. “Deciding what’s in another person’s heart is too egotistical. That’s for Horse, not you. I get that you feel like you have certain character issues that might put him in danger, and his safety is now your primary concern, but he’s the kind of man who can handle a strong woman.”
“Trixie’s right,” Felicia said, nodding rapidly. “You let him know the deal, that you’re trending towards psycho, and give him an out, but give it to him; don’t force it down his throat. He’s a grown-up hombre and can handle making his own choices.”
“I like that,” Dirk said from the doorway, remnants of black tape still stuck on his wrists and forearms where they were crossed over his body, muscles bunching, eyes sharp and burning with something that made my knees weak and my heart race faster in my chest.
Jezebel gestured at him. “You couldn’t stay put for five more minutes? This is why I don’t let people in my house.”
