His mouth was on mine, and it was soft and playful this time. He was smiling. He had been kissing me for two hours, and it was so magical and new that this one right now felt like the first time it had ever happened. I smiled and touched his face, loving the feel of his lips—the taste of them.
"You're beautiful," I said to him.
He reached up and touched the hair that was near my temple. "This time you really are coming back in a couple of months," he said. "Alex promised. No surprises. He told me the money's in the bank, so nothing can go wrong."
"Yeah, it seems like we're all set for starting in May."
"That's just a few months," he said again, as if to assure himself.
"Yeah, two and a half. I'll be back really soon."
"I still feel like that's a long time. I think I might miss you."
I loved that it felt long to him. "I think I might miss you, too," I said, trying to play it cool.
Henry and I held onto each other tightly, like neither of us could bear to let the other one go.
We were up until the middle of the night, talking and kissing and holding onto each other. In those moments, it felt real, what we had. It felt like love. I knew it was early to say that, but it really did feel like love.
It was one of the best nights of my whole life.
Chapter 12
I left after the funeral the following day.
I had to take the rented car back to the airport, so I told Henry goodbye in the parking lot of the funeral home. He didn't kiss me, but we hugged each other, and we both said we'd look forward to the start of the series in a couple of months.
It wasn't awkward, but it was different than we had been the night before. Of course, it was different. Last night, I was comfortably tangled in his arms on his couch, and today the sun was out, and we were around forty other people. We kept our distance and behaved like friends. We paid our respects. We hadn't made any plans or promises to each other, so I wasn't sure what to expect moving forward.
I started playing chess with Henry online.
We had each other's phone numbers, but we never texted. We only messaged each other through the chess app. We kept a game going where the time limit was one day to make a move, and we messaged between moves. Henry was a lot better at chess than I was, and he could easily beat me, but he took it easy, even though I was pretty sure it hurt his average on the app. I wasn't a serious chess player, but I studied and got better in those weeks because I had fun connecting with Henry that way.
Months passed, and I got a new chess partner and friend. We didn't mention that night in Butte, but we talked every day, and we both looked forward to seeing each other again.
It seemed to take forever because I was so busy with finals and wrapping up my classes early. But the time was finally here.
It was May, and we had reached the day Ty and I would arrive on set. It was Saturday, and we would start filming the first scene on Monday. The cast and crew had a window of time to arrive on either Saturday or Sunday, and Ty and I came in as early as possible.
We saw a couple of people at the airport who we suspected were part of the cast or crew, but we didn't talk to them. Our dad had wanted us to have access to a nice vehicle while we were here so that we didn't have to depend on anyone or feel stuck anywhere. He rented us an SUV for the entire trip, and I was thankful when we got into it and drove to the ranch on our own. Ty said she was glad we had been there before, since it all felt more comfortable.
There were tents and gathering places in the vacant lot that was adjacent to the Sutter's family home. I knew that was where those things would be situated, but it was different getting there and seeing them all set up. I had no access to the apartment we had stayed in before. The cast and crew had our own trailers, and I had one to share with Ty.
Our mom had been in touch with Mrs. Sutter, and she had things shipped so they could set up our trailer with all the comforts of home. I was thankful our mom had done that even though I felt bad that Mrs. Sutter had the extra work.
It was big news that our trailer had been beefed up and was different than the others because we were greeted with people saying we had the best trailer on the lot and that everyone was ordering things to make theirs better. More than half of the castand crew arrived on Saturday, and because Sunday was a day off, there were already plans to drive "to town" (meaning Butte) and go out that night.
Ty had already told them she was going, and I said I probably would as well. I wanted to agree to anything social in hopes that I would run into Henry. He was the first thing I thought of when they mentioned going out. It would be a good way to get to talk to him without being obvious. I had it all worked up in my mind that Henry would get word of us going out, and he would want to join us. I hadn't seen him yet, but he knew I was coming in today, and we had casually mentioned seeing each other at dinner.
The Sutters were hosting dinner at the new set building with catered barbecue. I knew Henry would come by, but we had been there a whole hour and already eaten, and he never came in. Finally, he appeared. He was with Josh, and they both looked freshly showered.
My sister was sitting next to me, and she had no idea I had these feelings or that I had been waiting so patiently for him to arrive. I hadn't mentioned anything to her. She had noticed that something was different about me lately, and she assumed I had grown fond of someone at school in San Francisco. I didn't confirm or deny any of it, and she didn't press the subject. She had no idea that when Henry came into the room my heart started pounding out of my chest.
Henry was better than any guy I knew at school or at home. He was different. I was more attracted to him than I had ever been to any other guy. I got nervous and antsy when he walked in. I experienced feelings I didn't normally have.
He and Josh went straight to the table where Henry's parents were sitting. They shook hands with Alex and the others who were around that table. After a minute, Alex walked them to our table, where he introduced Henry and Josh to us as the horse trainer and his assistant. He said that Henry would be with uson set and would help us through any scenes we had regarding horses.
Shakespeare was the one who said that expectation was the root of all heartache.Well, was it too much to expect that Henry would at least act like he recognized me?Was that too much to ask?But, no. He just stood there with Alex and Josh and gave our table a vague, disconnected greeting. He barely even glanced at me.
