"Shh," he said quietly, shaking his head. "Please don't waste time with apologies. I'm just saying that we're pressed for time because I'm trying to explain my forward behavior."
"What forward behavior?"
He leaned toward me, getting to the edge of his chair and reaching. "I'm going to go ahead and pull you over here for a minute, okay? Is it all right? Would you feel comfortable with that?"
I could think of nothing, not one thing, that would make me more comfortable than Alex pulling me over for a minute. I just smiled.
"Yes, I would feel comfortable," I said shyly.
He sat back and pulled me onto his lap, and I situated myself on his leg, propping my arm on his shoulder, looking at him. I was still higher than him, but only by inches now and not by feet. I tried not to think about the fact that I was on his lap. My legs were touching his. Sure, it was through fabric, but I felt weak and warm because of it.
"I like you so much, Josie. My heart is… you do something to me. I think about you dating that guy in Colorado, and I can't stand the thought of you doing this with someone else. I know how that sounds when it comes out of my mouth, and I know Ihave no right to say who you go out with, but I just feel sick at the thought of—"
"I haven't, anyway," I said, shaking my head.
His eyes snapped to meet mine. They were golden with a darker, brownish color at the edge. They gave him a feral, dangerous appearance that made my heart beat fast every time. He didn't say anything. We were quiet for several long seconds. I was waiting for him to say something.
"That guy you've dated in Colorado." It was more of a statement than a question, and I didn’t know how to respond.
"Yes?" I said.
"You didn't… what I mean to say is that you haven't… hang on…" he paused. "Who was the last person to kiss you, Josie?" he asked, glancing away from me as he waited for my answer.
I hesitated. "W-well… you."
He let out a strained, almost wheezing sigh and touched his eyebrows. I could feel how pent up he was.
"Are you okay?" I asked, being tender with him, flirting.
"Yes. I'm great, actually. Is that the truth?"
"Yes."
"Josie, all I can think about is being next to you, and this just makes it worse. I want to be with you so much it hurts."
"You are with me."
"I know, but I want more, longer."
I took an unsteady breath, my chest rising in little bursts.
"You're barely… you're on the edge of my leg, and I'm burning up right now."
I didn't know what to say. Everything I could think of in that moment sounded insufficient for how I felt. "I'm burning up, too, so it's okay."
I reached up and touched the side of his beautiful, striking face, and he leaned in. He took it as permission to kiss me. I could feel what he was doing, and I leaned toward him.
Our lips met for a glorious, soft second, and I was in a place of bliss for a moment before he pulled back. I smiled when he grabbed onto me and gave me a squeeze, clamping his big arms around my body. He groaned and squeezed, and I laughed. And then we were staring at each other from only inches away and our mouths were meeting again. He placed his lips to mine for a long second, and then he did it again and again, 3, 4, 5 times, I lost count. Then we paused, and I reached up and touched his cheek with my fingertips. That made him do it again.
"Ohh, Josieee," he groaned. "I have to see you again before you—stand up." He said the last phrase sharply and in a different, strict tone. As he said it, he gently pushed me off of his lap and slid back in his chair.
"Can I call you tonight?" he asked softly, staring at me.
I nodded and straightened just in time for Judd to open the door.
"Heyy, did we give you guys enough time?" he asked before he came inside.
"Yes, thanks again, Josie," Alex said, looking at me with an edge of regret.
