Dammit. He hadn’t meant to say her name.
“Well, good to know you remembered her name. This must be serious, then.” Jason slapped him cheerfully on the back. “Should I be worried about you?”
“Nah, mate, it’s all good.” He could feel the heat rising to his face. “Don’t have to worry about me at all. I know what I’m doing.” He was uncomfortable as hell with the banter from his mates. He felt like he had to be careful about what he said about her. He didn’t want to say a word against her, though it went deeper. He felt he needed to be protective of her.Where has this come from?This wasn’t the way to react about someone who was just an affair. Not that he would pay her out or reveal details to his mates, he was a private guy. He had never felt the need to brag. Things had changed with how he felt about her. He didn’t want to tell them anything.
“So what does she do for a living, then?” asked Dan.
“Design.” The question another reminder that he didn’t know much about her. And that the tightness in his chest suggested he ached to know more. Sure, he knew that Raven was hot, looked after herself, was confident, open-minded, but there was so much more he wanted to know about her. What food did she like to eat? Was she happy with her life? Did she ever want to get married? Could she see herself living on a farm? With him?Could I ask her tonight?He wasn’t sure if that was a good idea or not. It might frighten her off, make it look like he was looking for a relationship. Or worse, that he was desperate or something. He wasn’t that.
It was best to talk about anything but farming. He could tell Jason and Dan were enjoying this. He picked up a menu.
“I’m ordering fish and chips.” It was his go-to food dish. Again, he wondered what Raven’s go-to meal was. Ben’s mind flipped to thinking about Raven in more detail. The black lace dress she’d worn last night had been beautiful. If he’d managed to keep a little more self-control, then he would’ve enjoyed peeling it from her body instead of rushing because of the urgency that filled him. He promised that’s what he’d do tonight. Maybe. What would she be wearing? Something just as stunning he was sure. Something that he wouldn’t be able to peel off her gorgeously curvy body, muscles that showed signs of a decent gym workout. He shifted uneasily on his feet. His jeans were getting a little tighter, and he struggled to stop himself from thinking any more about Raven and removing clothing from her body.
“Fine, there’s a booth over there we can sit and eat, and continue this chat aboutRaven.” Jason pointed to where people were leaving a booth in the corner.
“Hey, what do you think of the judge? Bit green. Hear he’s into breeding the llapacas.” It was his poor attempt at trying to change the subject.
“Bloody llapacas, always someone trying to breed hybrids, good luck to them, hasn’t taken off yet.” Jason laughed. He shrugged his shoulders as he sat down. “Last year’s judge was worse.”
“He was all over the place with his decisions as if he didn’t even know what an alpaca was.”
“Don’t remind me. Dad was having a fit over it all.” Ben let the others sit first so that he was positioned where he could just barely see one of the main entrances to the bar area. The last thing Ben wanted was to miss seeing Raven.
Jason raised his glass. “To your dad.”
The three men raised their glasses and took a chug of beer. It was getting easier with the emotions concerning his dad, what had been kept under a tight lid was now losing, and he was glad he wasn’t a crying mess in the corner. He took a deep breath. This was just what he needed. This and some more time with Raven.
“Maybe next year you can judge?” suggested Dan.
It was Ben’s turn to laugh. “No way.”
“You could.”
“But then I couldn’t exhibit my stock.” And that’s what he wanted to do. He had his eye on a stud alpaca, a new male to buy that would help increase the quality of the wool. So he hoped, though the next generation wouldn’t be ready for shearing until the following year. His herd of females needed a new stud male to keep things fresh. His dad had hung on to the breeding males too long. Not a bad idea, and it saved money, but it didn’t improve the next generation in any way. It was more like sticking with what you knew. He needed some cash flow for that first.
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the door open and he quickly looked to see if it was Raven coming in. His heart sunk. Just a young couple coming in for drinks and dinner. Based on what they wore, he could tell they were from the country wearing jeans and Wrangler shirts. They looked happy. His heart tightened in his chest.
Will I ever have that?He didn’t realize that the longing was so intense and how it caused him to think of Raven.
“Right, hit me up with your orders, and tonight’s meal is on me.” Dan motioned for the waitress to come over. It wasn’t table service here, but they’d gotten to know the staff since they spent so much time here during the week.
“Don’t go blowing all your prize money,” joked Ben. Dan had taken out two of the major prizes and was the Most Successful Exhibitor this year. Ben hoped to get that title next year. His competitive nature always close to the surface even when he was with his mates.
“Good thing you blokes are worth it.”
Ben found it harder to concentrate on the conversation after he’d ordered his food. He couldn’t help looking at the door every time it opened. So far, there was no sign of Raven. And now it was nearly eight thirty. She’d never been late before. A twist of his gut made him worry that she wasn’t going to come this time.
It was good while it lasted.The thought empty and caused an ache inside of him. He just had to see her again.
Raven was over an hour late. She glanced at the clock in her little Mazda 3, which was old and had about three previous owners, but it was what she could afford. It ran well, and that was all that mattered to her. Knock on wood it hadn’t caused her any mechanical issues so far, and she hoped it stayed that way. Things had been tense in the office, a weird vibe that she’d never felt before, and she was feeling out of sorts because of it.
Do I even bother?
It had been about an hour before her boss had left, then she’d rushed home, showered, and grabbed something to eat before getting into her car and driving the half-hour trip to the Goody Hotel. She was running on adrenaline. And deep breaths. At least there was no peak- hour traffic to deal with, and she wasn’t hitting too many red lights.
The thought of seeing Ben again perked her up. A bit more than that. She squeezed her thighs together. Fuck, she couldn’t wait until they were in his hotel room alone together. If he wasn’t there, well, she only had herself to blame. More like her boss. If she had gumption, perhaps she would’ve walked out earlier and be damned what her boss said. But then she wasn’t ready to lose a job right now. She needed to at least check out what other jobs were available, suss them out, before burning the bridge with Sarina. Luckily, she’d been saving a chunk of her wage since she’d been working. Even though that was going to be for a deposit to start up her business, if she had to, then she could use it to live off while she found another job. Bloody hell. She couldn’t believe that she was already thinking of needing to get another job.
Raven tuned into the Goody parking lot, turned off her car, got out, then grabbed her oversized handbag. This time she’d packed a change of clothes knowing well enough not to push Sarina by being late two mornings in a row. It also helped to make her feel somewhat prepared despite running so late. She took out a fresh mint from her bag and popped it into her mouth, the flavor giving her a little burst of energy that she really needed right now.
