Basically, he might as well add my heart to his breakfast smoothie tomorrow morning.
“What do you mean you’re not ready to come back? I need specifics,” I say to Jackson, who’s calling from his most recent location in Las Vegas.
“I’m sorry, Cici. I need more time,” he pleads.
“How much more?” I ask, trying to keep my frustration in check and refrain from losing my shit on my brother, who probably can’t take any more weight on his shoulders. I can picture him running his hand through his hair as he sighs.
“I wish I could answer that. Trust me. I’m just not hitting any solid leads, but I’m feeling hopeful here in Vegas. I think I’m on the right track. It’s only a matter of time before someone can point me in the right direction.”
“Okay. I have to ask. Are you giving yourself a time limit? Will you come home at some point even if you can’t find him?” I’m cringing at having to speak the words. My brother’s happiness is on the line—but isn’t mine too?
“Do you want me to tell you what you want to hear or the truth?”
“That’s what I was afraid of. All right, at least I’m prepared. Will you give me regular updates, then, so I’m somewhat aware of timing and if an end is in sight?”Because I’m losing hopeare the words I don’t add.
“Sorry, Cici. God, I’m so sorry. You really have no idea how much I appreciate you putting your life on hold for mine. Shit, this is all my fault. If only I hadn’t let her walk out my door that night, then none of us would be in this situation.”
“Hey, don’t go down that road. You aren’t clairvoyant, so you couldn’t have known what would happen. Besides, everythinghappens for a reason. I’m not sure what it is yet, but trust the process. At least things are going well here. Having Cindy back made all the difference. She’s amazing. She handles so much that I have plenty of time to keep my business alive in Bozeman, and with Poppy picking up the slack, it’s like I’m not even gone.”
“That’s great. How about Mom and Dad? Any progress?”
“Negative. And don’t expect that to change, although Cindy is pretty determined for us to mend things. I’m not sure what her plan is, but I can tell she’s brewing something.”
He laughs on the other end, and it’s nice to hear. “I’m not surprised. I hope she’s got something up her sleeve because it would be a relief to have you all talking again. Holidays would be so much easier.”
“Oh, well, in that case… I’ll be sure to tuck my tail between my legs so we can all hang out and sing kumbaya,” I say petulantly.
“Don’t be like that. You know I’m on your side. It would just be great for you all to get along. Anyway, tell me about everyone back home. Anything new?”
“You probably talk to the guys all the time, so I bet you’re caught up. But wedding plans are going great. I can’t believe it’s next month. I’m so excited! You’re coming home for that, right?”
“Yeah, but it’s at theendof the month, so I still have plenty of time. If all goes well, I’ll be back before that.”
“Ugh, let’s not start this topic again. Tell me about your search and what you’re doing in Vegas.”
We finish our conversation not much later, and after making him promise to be safe and keep me posted, we say goodbye.
I’d better call Poppy and tell her I won’t be returning when we thought and maybe not for quite a while. Staring at the orchid, I wonder just how long I’ll be here and what it would look like if I stopped avoiding Eli. Am I wasting the opportunity to be with him while I can, or is it smarter to refrain in the long run? I wish the answer was simple, but since it isn’t, I’ll just keep trudging along.
With one last nervous look in the mirror, I go catch my ride to meet Lily, Sebastian, Braden, and Eli for dinner. One of Lily’s other bridesmaids, Lucy, who I’ve met and adore, along with her boyfriend, Justin, who I haven’t met, were supposed to join us to plan our prewedding trip to Vegas, but something came up. It’s too bad since I was looking forward to the extra buffers between me and Eli.
I’ve kept my visits to Lily’s place to a minimum since the “tasting” with Eli three weeks ago. If you can even call it that. It felt more like a date to me. I knew my defenses had been weakening with all the time we’d been spending at his brother and Lily’s, becoming more invested in each other’s lives each time. Every week we were growing closer and closer, and after that amazing date—I mean, tasting—I almost caved. Especially since I’m celibate and more pent-up than a priest during midnight mass. A vibrator only satisfies to a certain point, and I have frustratingly reached that point.
My nerves are shot as I’m led through the restaurant to our group, who are all here, according to the waiter I’m following. When my eyes land on the table, they zone in on the only free chair—directly next to Eli. My belly flips at the discovery, making my hands go clammy and my heart thump harder. I focus on my smile to mask the unease mixed with anticipation at knowing we’ll be so close. Lily is directly across from me, with Braden at the head of the table between Sebastian and Eli.
Lily stands to hug me before taking my seat, and when I do, Eli’s smell instantly fills my lungs. It’s his familiar manly scent, clean and crisp, that makes me want to climb him like a tree. Welcome to the longest night in history.
“May I fill your glass or bring you something else to drink, miss?” the waiter pauses to ask.
A shot of tequila. In fact, make it two.
“Sure, I’ll have whatever they’re having.” Better not out my anxiety by asking for the hard stuff just yet.
“Certainly.” He fills my champagne flute. With the pricey stuff, I might add. Only the best for the Dubrees. Have I mentioned yet that they’re two of the wealthiest men in California? Their assets are in the billions. Lily did well on try number one. If only we were all so lucky. After her shit childhood, though, she’s undoubtedly due.
Once the waiter goes over specials and takes our order, Lily gets right down to business. “So now that we’ve decided to do the bachelor and bachelorette parties in Las Vegas, let’s talk about where we want to stay and what we want to do. It’ll be the five of us, Lucy, Justin, and Jackson.”
“Well, we’ll probably go clubbing. Right? I mean, it’s not a bachelorette party without dancing involved,” I say.
