Poppy: …
My phone rings as I’m trying to figure out how to respond.
“Hello?”
“Tell me it’s not a date,” Braden says with a mixture of anger and uncertainty.
“What does it matter?”
“Seriously? We just spent the weekend fucking, and it’s not supposed to bother me if you’re going out with another guy?”
“Oh, so you’ve never slept with a woman and then a different one the following night?”
I hear him breathe deeply before he responds with a level of control he’s obviously struggling to maintain. “Never with someone I cared about.”
“Then what are you really asking?” I need to know for sure where he’s at in his head. I can’t keep guessing his intentions. If he wants us to be more, it’s time to spit it out and quit beating around the bush.
“Are you seeing anyone else?”
“No, but I’m talking to someone and might meet him this week.”
The low growl to come from his throat is palpable through the phone. But honesty is important since I’m asking for it in return. Although, if Iambeing honest, I’m not looking forward to meeting Owen as much as I was.
“How can you still be interested in him after our time together? Did it mean nothing to you?”
It’s like he read my mind. But I can’t put all my cards on the table too soon.
“It did. But I’m confused. I’d already started talking to this guy, and dammit, you came out of nowhere. You weren’t even on the radar, and just because you waltz in here and give me the best weekend I’ve ever had, doesn’t mean I can drop everything else on the hope this goes somewhere. I’m not ready for that.We’renot ready for that.” I take a deep breath after using all my air in one go.
There. I said it, and if it blows up in my face, so be it. At least I’ll know it was the right decision if he’s willing to walk away so easily.
He’s silent for what seems like forever before finally responding. “Fuck. I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” I can picturehim running his hand through his hair, making me smile. I do miss him, but I won’t tell him that.
“It’s okay.” I throw him a bone for his apology, which probably isn’t easy for him.
“No. It isn’t. I’m crazy about you, Poppy, and I’m not sure what to do about it. I’m aware that it’s not fair to barge into your life and demand exclusivity, but dammit, that’s what I want.”
“Normally, I’d be all for it, but it’s complicated. We’re too far apart, and I want more than you can give me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Really, Braden? So you’ll move here tomorrow, live with me, get engaged, and start making babies?”
He laughs. “I like the sound of the last part. Do we have to do it in that order?”
I can’t help but laugh along with him. “I’m serious.”
“So am I.”
“Braden,” I chastise.
“All right, here’s the deal. I like you—a lot. I’ll admit the distance is a problem for now. If you lived here, I’d be open to the moving-in part, but fuck, Poppy, I don’t know how to make this work, but I sure as hell want to try. Are you at least with me on that?”
“I’d like to be, but it’s bad timing. I’m not willing to throw away the start of something else on a mere possibility. I need more than that. Can we keep things the way they are and see how it goes? I’m notopposedto more, but I’m not ready to go in blind.”
“You mean without a crystal ball?” he asks sarcastically.
“That’s not fair.”
