Honestly, if he really wants to impress me with his money, he shouldn’t spend it on me. He should spend it on this community. On the town that raised us and the people who spent years caring for us. On all the kids whose parents don’t make enough to pay for every meal but still seem to spend eighty hours a week working.
If Kai has so much extra to give, I don’t want him to give it to me. I want him to be the person he was before he left. The one who shared my dreams.
But that Kai is gone, and so are those dreams.
Ignoring the huge bundle of long-stemmed red roses, which I have never liked, I pull my door shut and lock it. I take a step before turning back and double-checking just to make sure it’s definitely locked. If I stupidly left it open, I wouldn’t put it past him to start leaving the flowers in the apartment itself.
“Plum,” Kai says behind me, popping out of his apartment and scaring the shit out of me.
I scream, tossing my keys in the air, cringing when they go flying over my head into the wall behind me. He’s quick to snatch them up, holding them fucking hostage as he frowns at all of the rejected gifts.
“You don’t like any of the flowers I’ve sent you?”
“No,” I snap, not meeting his eyes as I turn to face him. “Now give me my keys and leave me alone.”
“I will when you tell me why you don’t like the flowers. Is it because you don’t like any of the ones I picked out, or is it just because they’re from me?”
I don’t know why I do it, but I look up into his eyes.
Maybe it’s his tone, so soft and wounded, like he’s in pain. Maybe I just want to see if it’s really there in his eyes, or if this is only a trick to get me to lower my guard.
For a moment, he stares back at me, looking almost like the boy I once knew. The boy I once loved.Vulnerable. Kind. Genuine—like he just wants to make things better for me.
“Both.” I sigh, letting him see way more of me than I should. “You used to know what my favorite flower is,” I add in a whisper, breaking eye contact to stare at my feet.
“Those are weeds, Plum. Not flowers. No one sells them,” Kai says, and I wince.
“Well, weeds or not, you never needed to buy them for me in the past, did you? Or are you too good to go out and pick them yourself now?” I snap, feeling that familiar ache of old wounds ripping back open. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter. I don’t want you sending me flowers or anything else.”
He goes both still and silent, so I seize the opportunity to snatch my keys back from his hand. The second I rescue them, I spin on my heel and escape down the hall before he can recover. The next time I face him, I won’t be alone, and maybe, just maybe, I won’t feel as weak as I do right now.
Tears sting my eyes, and I swipe at them angrily.
Maybe dandelions are a metaphor for the love I thought we once had. I always thought they were the best kind of flower because they grew anywhere. They’re vibrant and beautiful, but they turned out to just be weeds.
That’s us. Nothing more than a pretty trick.
Chapter Nine
Well, the Christmas Village date went all fucking wrong. It was such an epic fail that today all I feel is hopeless. As I get ready for the charity event, I have to talk myself out of bailing no less than six times.
Kai never showed up last night, so neither did Bee. The guys and I called it an early night because of today's event, especially when I realized it was just going to be the three of us with Sable and her newly bonded mates.
If I’ve ever wondered what a newly bonded pack looks like, I got my answer last night. It’s horny. They look ready to rip each other's clothes off at all times. It’s amazing to see my best friend so happy, but holy hell, an hour into the night, and I was already choking on her scent.
Poor Nick and Benson looked like they couldn’t breathe. I can’t imagine the scent of their brother’s mate is something they enjoyed all that much. She’s my best friend, and I could barely handle it. And her men? I found myself sniffing Nick’s fucking armpit just to get a lungful of something other than their pheromones.
Honestly, it’s probably for the best that Kai wasn’t there, because the contrast between Sable and her men, compared to how I was with Nick and Benson, was fucking obvious.
Sable assumed I was just being shy about PDA.
She’s not wrong, but it wasn’t for the reasons she thought. I was being shy, but I was also really nervous. I was so unsure, especially after seeing how touchy Sable is with her men. How often they kiss her. The fact that they literally can’t seem to keep their hands to themselves. I thought I’d be able to fake it once I needed to, but last night showed me how wrong I am.
We haven’t spent enough time alone, and I feel like I don’t know what their boundaries are. If I lean in for a kiss, are they going to reject me? Will either of them be okay with holding my hand? Fuck, I feel like I’m losing my shit a little bit. Sure, I was just a teenager when Kai and I dated, but fucking hell, the difference between then and now is clearly noticeable.
The three of us agreed that for this to look real, it needs to feel pretty real. Yet, last night was such a disaster that even after weeks of public mini dates, we looked like casual acquaintances. Not lovers. Not serious. Not obsessed. And definitely not convincing enough to help keep Kai at a distance.
After the charity event tonight, I’ll be talking to them both. Stella gets here Wednesday, and if something doesn’t change soon, then everyone’s going to see right through this whole charade.
