Before I bought myself a fucking ereader, which my mother didn’t know about.
It didn’t have wifi, but it held every friend I’d ever made in its tiny little shell.
The thought made me feel freer. Let me breathe a little easier. One tiny act of independence cut off my mother’s reach by a huge chunk.
The orderly who checked my stuff knew I had it, but he’d shoved it aside as negligible and likely forgot it existed. I hoped.
I stared at the white ceiling now. Yes, I needed to get out here. And then run as far and as fast as I could manage.
Would Ash chase me down? He’d seen my record; he’d known something with my case wasn’t right. Soon, he’d get the call, be offered a lot of money, and then I’d once again be relegated to dollar signs. Only be worth what my status as a senator’s daughter and a six digit pay day.
I realized that was the part I couldn’t stand. Ash looking at me and seeing dollar signs after the way he’d touched and kissed and made love to me.
I wouldn’t be able to survive that.
A knock at my door, and I looked over the covers to watch the same burly bearded orderly bring in a tray. A bowl and a cup of water. He sat it on my desk. “Doc said you might want this.”
Was this his response to the call? Take extra care of me so his money doesn’t go fluttering in the wind?
“What is it?”
“Just some oatmeal. Said it would settle your stomach.”
The orderly shrugged and handed me a spoon. A plastic spoon. Like I was some newbie who might use it as a shank.
“Thanks,” I said pointedly.
I wanted for him to leave. But he stood and eyed the trunk of books. “You like to read?”
I took the bowl off the tray and scooted up my bed. “No, I just like to drag these around with me wherever I go. You know, to keep the demons out.”
He stared at me, mouth open. I couldn’t help but to laugh at his expression. “Obviously, I like to read.”
He didn’t appreciate my sense of humor. Oh well, hopefully I’d be gone soon anyway.
“Are you going to stand there and watch me eat all of this?”
He jostled from foot to foot. “Policy. I have to take the tray back when I leave.”
In that case. I quickly shoved hot oatmeal in my mouth and handed him the bowl. “Thanks. Get out.”
He blinked at me a few times and pressed his eyes tight, but took the drinks and left me alone again.
Way to make friends with the locals. But experience taught me no friendship stood up to hard cash. No friendship, no relationship, nothing. A lesson learned the hard way over and over again.
The food had settled my roiling stomach. I pushed the trunk over and squeezed between the bed and its heavy metal frame. The door wasn’t locked, and I slipped out into the quiet hall. There usually were very few other inmates when I checked in. My mom wanted me locked away, but heaven forbid one of her offspring mix with mere mortals. Especiallyen masse.
A TV blared from the social room, and I followed the hall to the sound of it. An old lady sat passed out in an arm chair. Two women sat in the nurse’s station, and an orderly stood looming in the corner.
No Ash around that I could ascertain. Why did I want to see him again so soon? To reassure myself what I was going to try to do was necessary, worth the risk?
Or did I just want to look at him? Linger with my fantasies a little longer.
I sat in a chair and rocked it to face the station. Keeping watch for the perfect opportunity I told myself. My ereader weighed down the pocket of my sweater. I had a crumpled smuggled twenty in my shoe. Everything a girl needed to make a quick escape.
Time slipped by. I didn’t know how long I sat. A nurse had left, and my orderly had gone. Sunlit slanted through the windows at an angle now. Definitely time for the small night shift to take over.
I stood and yawned. Like I wanted to go to bed. The nurses barely spared me a glance. I walked slowly toward my room again, trying to think. Yes, the closet at the end of the hall. Cleaning supplies and stuff, but they usually keep an extra pair of scrubs. I could change, walk through once the night shift came on.
