“He saved me,” Melody added delicately.
“No,” I whispered. The end of my braid whipped back and forth in perpetual motion. Perpetual refusal.
Footsteps sounded from behind, and we all turned to see Dae shift back into a man as he rounded the corner. When his gaze landed upon me and he saw my tears, he ran. “What’s wrong?” he asked, crouching before me, his brown eyes wild as they assessed my body for injury. He fastened his hands on my hips.
“He did it,” I tried to say, but it came out as a stumbling whisper over my trembling lip. “He did it.” The second attempt wasn’t much better.
Dae whipped around, silently probing Tio for clarity.
“The King of Windguard attacked our camp. Killed half of our people.”
“Gods above,” Dae breathed, returning his consoling gaze back to me. “This isn’t your fault.” His hands were running over my cheeks, my head, my arms.
Too broken to even collapse into him, he took the lead. Just as he always knew how to care for my shattering self, he pulled me against his chest. I sobbed, my scream of agony muffling against his bunched shirt in my fists.
“I’m sorry, Ro. I’m so sorry.” Dae stroked my hair and didn’t once attempt to silence my inconsolable cries. Even when I soaked through his shirt. Even when my fingers clawed at his skin for something to hold on to. He held me through it.
“I should have been there. They’re gone. I could have helped.” I coiled into my ocean of shame and regret, but lifted my swolleneyes to meet Dae’s. “But then there’s you. I don’t regret you.” My lip trembled like a sheet billowing in a storm. I cupped his jaw as tears continued to rain down, splattering every one of my broken emotions onto our legs.
He pressed his forehead against mine, sliding one hand to the base of my neck in that familiar, comforting hold. “Don’t worry about me. You’re allowed to be angry, Ro. Don’t hold it in.”
My body shook. The overwhelming stress had me wanting to empty my stomach. I nestled into the crook of his neck, a spot that had become like a second home. I supposed now it was my only home, which added to my agony. I wanted to remain here, in his arms, hiding in his embrace, forever.
“Will they even let us pass?” Melody asked.
“Who, Nick’s army?” Tio said.
“No, what if the King of Windguard sent his army to the front lines, too? How do we get past?”
“Maybe you two can board a ship instead. Sail to South Harbor’s port,” I suggested, sniffling my runny nose.
Dae’s heated glare fell upon me. “Two?”
I pressed a quick kiss to his lips, knowing he wanted me to catch the first ship out of this crooked kingdom. “You need to go find your brothers. Tio and Melody have to get back to Highcrest, to tell Nicholas and Nora everything we know about The Order. I can’t leave yet.”
“Youcan,” he whispered, smearing the wet trail on my cheek with his thumb.
My heart cracked and bled at the lie I was about to tell. “Everything will be okay. I’ll lie low and wait for you. I need you to do what I can’t. What matters most to me now is making sure we save who we can. You’ll help me with that, right?” He would help me with anything if I asked. He’d proven that time and time again. Which made my betrayal all the more painful.
“Of course.” Dae kissed me with fierce passion, a strong crease between his eyebrows holding firm. “We’ll do it together.”
I only offered a liar’s smile.
66
Dae
Ihated seeing Ro suffer. Fleeting moments when her brazen, fiery flame flickered under sorrow or hardship had been hard to watch, but the person walking next to me now was almost a ghost. Her candle had been snuffed out, a vacancy behind her eyes where life should be.
And she still refused to leave until my brothers were safe.
If I devoted the rest of my life to worshipping her, it would be inadequate, a pittance compared to what she deserved. I would dedicate myself to her, walk this lonely road at her side, hold her up when her own strength failed. Remind her every hour of every day that she wasn’t alone.
Several days had passed since we’d learned of the tragedy that’d befallen her camp, and she’d barely spoken. The only evidence she even still existed was the warmth and firm grip from her hand in mine, like if she let go, she might drift away in her sea of despair. I’d never let that happen.
Tio had tried several times to encourage engagement. She’d only stared at him with a heartbroken smile, an appreciation forthe friend that survived. When she did respond, her words were swollen with love. Like she could make up for all the unspoken words she’d never get to say to all those who perished under Windguard’s attack.
We found rest and food supplies in one of the towns, and I hoped it would ease her strife. We bathed and replaced our clothes so we didn’t stand out in our filthy attire. Some families would find their clotheslines a little emptier that day, but it was necessary for our survival as we journeyed closer to Kabash.
