Steel pocketed Melanie’s picture. “Yes.”
Tracy’s chin dipped, and she closed her eyes, squeezing them tight as if to hold back her tears. She took several deep breaths, her shoulders heaving with each one, before she lifted herself back up and straightened her spine. “You murdered the wrong man.”
That was the second time in two days someone had said that to him. Steel did not back down. “Griffin Shaw was dead the moment he came after me, regardless of my misassumption that he killed my daughter.”
Tracy winced. “I’m sorry. No matter what you’ve done, no one deserves to lose a child like that.”
Steel didn’t know if what he’d ‘done’ referred to his killing Shaw or her belief that Steel had framed Shaw for crimes that landed him in jail. He didn’t care. Tracy’s opinion of him didn’t matter.
He stood up off her desk. “I came here to look you in the eye to verify you had nothing to do with my daughter’s murder, and you don’t. Your poor taste in men is not reason enough to die in my book.” He walked past her towards her office door. “Consider yourself lucky.”
“Lucky?” Tracy scoffed just as Steel’s hand was reaching for the door handle. “You killed my lover and you think it makes me lucky that you leftmealive?”
Steel paused, turning slightly. “You loved him.” He could see it in her eyes. Whatever it was she had had with Shaw, it hadn’t been a fleeting fancy. At least, not on her part.
Tears escaped her eyes, running a shiny trail through the foundation covering her cheeks. “He lovedme,” she corrected. “We were going to build a life together, but you wouldn’t leave him alone. He knew the moment that he learned of your daughter’s death that you would come after him. What sort of sick fuck are you that you get such joy out of ruining a man’s life? Wasn’t sending him to jail for thirty years enough? He was yourfriend!What did he ever do to make you hate him so much?”
Steel watched as Tracy sniffled and used her coat sleeve to wipe her nose. At the end of the day, he didn’t care what Tracy did or did not believe about him. He would never see her again after this moment. But she did deserve to know the monster she’d let into her life and her bed. “Shaw wasn’t the man you thought he was. I’ll have my Tech send you over a file. It’s up to you to read it or trash it. Makes no difference to me.”
Jenna hada hard time reaching for her phone. It was sitting on her end table, still on the charger from the night before. Today had been a bad day. She wasn’t in pain, but no matter whatposition she was in, lying down or sitting up, she felt like she was lying on a hard, unforgiving bed of pebbles. After many failed attempts to relax, she ended up on her back with a pile of pillows around her for support. She’d been sleeping on and off, trying to escape the discomfort.
Lilly had been in numerous times with food, drinks, and just to sit with her while Ollie was at school. After he came home, he used her chair lift to bring himself up the stairs before he hobbled over on his crutches to be with her. Only Ollie could make a cast and crutches look fantastical. She hadn’t been paying attention to their credit card statements the past few months, but to be honest, if it made Ollie feel better, she didn’t care what it cost her.
But Ollie had left to do homework and Lilly was downstairs doing something when Jenna’s phone rang. Since Lilly had put out a message to the club that Jenna needed rest today, she could only assume it was Jack calling her. Frustration at her slow-moving body made her cringe and gasp as her finger tips just barely brushed the device. She wasn’t wearing her watch and her Kindle, which Lilly had set up for her on the attachable bed arm and with the page-turning remote earlier, didn’t accept phone calls.
Her phone went quiet. Jenna sagged, her chin wobbling that she’d missed the call.
After his call two mornings ago, he’d been texting her on and off. She wasn’t sure if he’d sent any messages today because she had yet to be on her phone.
“…not your fucking operator, Jackie! Let me see. She’s probably sleeping.” Lilly’s voice echoed up the stairs, and it was a minute or so later that she walked through Jenna’s bedroom door. Lilly met her eyes and must have registered Jenna’s frustration because her anger at her brother immediately evaporated. “Oh, dear.” Coming forward, Lilly suddenly stoppedand her face darkened as she said into the phone, “Well if you were here where you’re supposed to be, Jack Duncan, you’d know the answer to that yourself.” There was a pause as Lilly listened and then she rolled her eyes. “Give me a minute to get her situated and then she’ll call you back.”
Jenna could still hear the gravel of Jack’s voice speaking as Lilly hung up the phone. Approaching the bed, Lilly put her hands on her hips. “Really? Of all the men on the planet, you had to choose him?”
Jenna’s lips twitched. “What other men on the planet?”
“I see you’re feeling better towards him.”
It was a fine line, but ever since Pastor Melrose had had her scream and yell at God, Jenna had been feeling more centered. She wasnotokay. She was an emotional wreck and her body was in turmoil, but there was something different. Though it was finite, its very presence gave her the possibility of hope for a future. It might not be a future like what she’d had or even one with much light in it, but its existence had seemed impossible only a week ago.
Jack’s phone call two days ago had cemented the fact that, good or bad, light or dark, that future would still have him in it. She was no longer thinking of him in a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde mentality. There was no Steel versus Jack, the soldier versus the husband. Because regardless of his crimes, his darkness, or his mentality, he was hers.
Always had been, always would be.
This was the hardest moment in their life that they had to get through, but theywouldget through it. While Jenna didn’t see the path yet, she knew that God would present it to her when she was ready.
“Do you want to hold up the phone or should I go borrow Ollie’s headphones?” Lilly asked, picking Jenna’s phone up off the charger.
Jenna tipped her chin to the wall across from the bed. “Melanie’s should be in the top box.” She could see the label of Electronics from where she lay on the mattress.
The club had gone up to Melanie’s dorm room and cleaned her things out a couple of days after the funeral. Most of her things were still in the boxes, with a few exceptions. The baby blanket Jenna had knitted for her was now on Jenna and Jack’s bed; picture frames of family vacations and holidays were on Jack’s nightstand facing Jenna’s side of the bed; and Melanie’s favorite sandalwood lotion pump bottle was now in easy reach of Jenna.
Using Melanie’s things wasn’t Jenna’s way of recycling or trying to reclaim them. They brought her mild comfort in her grief, both in memory and in prayer. She needed Melanie’s things so shewouldn’tforget.
After Lilly retrieved the headphones, she brought them over to the bed. “Do you need anything else before you call him back?”
Jenna knew what she was asking. She both hated and appreciated the question, because no one enjoyed having to be changed like a newborn by their sister-in-law. At least there had been something sensual and intimate when Jack had had to take care of her in that way. With Lilly, it was just downright embarrassing. But it was what needed to be done, so they both endured and did what they had to do.
“Just some water,” Jenna answered. If Jack were here, he could just carry her to the bathroom as needed. Neither Lilly nor Tessa had the strength to do that, and Jenna valued the lives of the club members too much to ask any of them for assistance. Carter or Jordan would have been able to, but neither one was around anymore. Jordan was in Annecy, France, and Carter was back home taking care of a two year old and his pregnant wife.
