“Open your eyes.”
Jenna shook her head. “You’re going to yell at me. You’re going to say that you’d never do such a thing, because you’re loyal and you’re a good person, Jack. I know you love me, andthat will never change. I know you’ll be with me until the end. You’ll never in a million years admit how much pain you’re in, Jack, but I see it. I love you, and I hate that I’m putting you through this, and I just pray that you don’t look back on our life together with regret?—”
“Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Andlook at me.”
Jenna flinched into her pillow, but she blinked and slowly raised her hazel, tear-filled eyes to look at him.
“You want the fucking truth? I’m not a good man. I might be honorable, but I’ll never be good. Not when it comes to you. If there was a way to save you, I’d pay it, regardless of cost or consequence. I would put you and our kids in a tiny bubble and burn the rest of the world to save you. But there isn’t, and I’m not mad enough to grasp at flimsy strings or make empty promises that I know I can’t keep. This fucking disease hasn’t just beaten me, Jen, it’sdestroyedme. Because it’s taking the most precious thing in the world to me. And I fucking hate it. I hate God and the universe, and fuck, I even hate your parents right now because one of them obviously carried the gene that got passed to you.”
He gripped her chin to force her face forward and she tried to hide into her pillow again. “But don’t you fucking tell me not to regret our life, because I do! I regret not spending every fucking second I have of this life with you. Money, jobs, vows to my country, forming this club… I regret it all, because it took me away fromyou. My priorities have pulled me from your side for too fucking long and I willneverforgive myself for it. But regret loving you? Regret meeting you, knowing you, making love to you, claiming you…?” Steel shook his head. “Don’t ever let me hear those words come out of your mouth again, Jen. Because it’s beyond possible or probable. Loving you is who I am. It’s what I was put on this fucking planet to do, and if I regret that, then I might as well not be here at all.”
It took a long while,but eventually both dozed off. Steel, unfortunately, didn’t sleep for long. Too many thoughts swirling around in his head to rest, but he stayed where he was to keep Jenna company. He didn’t know what happened after the others left his house, and it wasn’t his decision as to what Ghost did next. He needed to protect Jenna and his family, and he could only do that if he had all the information.
Who the fuck was after him? It made no sense, and the timing? What had happened in the past year that would cause him to become someone’s target?
A year ago in November, he’d killed Cheryl. Executed her in the snow. It had been the same week they’d received Jenna’s official diagnosis.
Nothing epic had happened until January when a bomb had been discovered on property. The official story was that the club’s housekeeper’s husband had planted it. Steel had his doubts, and he knew Ghost did too. Regardless of who planted the bomb, Merrick had been an abusive asshole, and Steel lost no sleep over him no longer breathing. Ghost would be keeping an eye on Carter, Yelizaveta and Merrick’s seventeen year old son with autism, as there was a high probability the teen had actually been the one to create the bomb.
Carter might have framed his father to protect his mother, but there was no motive or evidence that pointed to a repeat of his actions. He’d done what he’d set out to do, and in a twisted way, he seemed happier for it.
Last February, Sophia and Pirate had gotten drunk in San Francisco and accidentally got married. Then her ex had returned and started to stalk her. It was his buddies that hadattacked Pirate and Sophia with heavy gunfire and rammed their cage into Pumpkin’s motorcycle, landing Pumpkin in the ICU. Her ex had been the one to shoot Scar when he’d stepped between Sophia and a bullet.
But that cowardly bastard was long dead and his father had paid out a very hefty settlement to Pirate, Jasmine and Jumper, and Pumpkin for his son’s actions.
Then there was Primis, the paramilitary group the club had helped dismantle at the beginning of the summer after they’d learned that Scar wasn’t dead. He was alive and stalking the leader’s daughter before getting re-captured by Primis. It had been Keys who’d done the hardest job. Ghost and Keys had broken in to dismantle their systems from the inside, turning their D.C. Headquarters into a makeshift prison by turning the building’s defenses on the employees.
Alpha, Tally’s father, was dead, and his partner was in prison. Even in prison, he might have reach, but if he went after anyone, it would be Scar, not Steel.
Who would come after him?
The door cracked open and Ollie’s head poked in. Steel and Jenna had the same rules for him as they had for their other children. Their bedroom door didn’t have a lock on it. The kids either learned to knock and wait for an answer or they could risk entering and scarring themselves for life. The choice was theirs, but Steel wasn’t going to stop having sex with his wife just because it creeped his kids out.
Ollie, seeing that Steel was awake, held up his phone and jiggled it pointedly.
Steel looked over his shoulder at his cell, which he’d put on silent like Jenna’s so they could try to rest. It must be desperate if someone had called Ollie when they couldn’t get ahold of him.
Silently, Steel gestured to his bed in question. Ollie nodded, stepping into the room after pocketing his phone. They tried toswitch places as smoothly as possible. Steel touched Ollie’s head in gratitude. He didn’t want to wake Jenna, but he also didn’t want her to wake up alone. Ollie gave him a smile before settling down. The teen fluffed Steel’s pillow like he was getting ready to join Jenna in Dreamland even though it was the early afternoon.
Stepping out into the hall, Steel looked at his phone. He had two missed calls from Carter, one from Jordan, and five missed text messages from Melanie. Shit. Of course they were worried about their mother. Last Steel had spoken to them, Jenna was still having an active episode.
Heading downstairs to put some coffee on, because fuck did he need it, Steel opened up the group chat he had with just Carter, Melanie, and Jordan. There was another one that also had Ollie in it and yet another one that also had Ollie and Jenna in it, but he didn’t want to call their phones upstairs and this was the fastest way he knew how to dial his kids in a conference call.
“Hey, Dad.” Carter was the first to answer. “You’ve got me and Lucy. What’s going on?”
“Hold on,” Steel started, but then Jordan’s voice came over the line.
“Dad, how’s Mom?”
“She’s not answering her phone,” came Melanie’s concerned voice.
Well, at least all of them were on. Steel had no idea how to add a person to the call if one of them had missed picking up in time.
“She’s resting,” Steel told them. “I put her phone on silent.”
“Why didn’t you call us?” Carter demanded. “If you were busy, at least have Ollie fill us in on what’s going on!”
While none of his kids had followed his footsteps to Uncle Sam’s door, Carter was the most similar to Steel. Their builds were the same, and their voices were nearly identical. And just like his father, Carter had fallen hard and fast for his woman,and never looked back. Jordan and Melanie took after Jenna. Both sweet-natured and with hearts of gold. Jordan had gotten into a lot of fights as a teen, but not for being a troublemaker. Because he always stood between a bully and his victim, even at the cost of his own bodily harm.
