“A song?”
“Yup.” I almost bang the bottle against my forehead. There’s only one song Derek has taught Clem how to sing, when she just started to piece together full sentences. Has he really forgotten?
“Oh!” He claps and I nod. “Everybody Wants to Rule the World. Such a classic.”
Classic to the masses, sure, but Heath has officially banned the song in his house after Clem ran around repeating the single lyric she knows for five days straight.
We don’t remind her of that song in fear she’ll latch onto it again, but Derek doesn’t need to know that.
“It came on when we were at mini golf. Said it reminded her of you.”
There. Now if by some small chance they see each other soon, there’s at least some semblance of a truth. Clem did mention Derek at mini golf, in passing.
“You guys went to mini golf?”
“A while ago. Paris went out of town for a conference. Heath was having some car issues. I was watching her until he got back so I took her and Liliana to mini golf and-”
“Pause.” Derek holds out a hand, and I stop midsentence. “Who’s Liliana?”
Fuck.
Heat is spreading over my skin. This is the perfect segue to talk about her, brag about the girl I’ve managed to somehow to make mine, but I’m still conflicted whether it’s wrong to talk about my love life in the wake of his.
My gap in speech fuels him, though. Any leftover dejection slips away from his features, replaced with the bright eyes and boyish grin he’s been known for his whole life.
“Holy shit! Who’s Liliana?!” He yells. When the sound echoes loudly off the walls of his apartment, I flinch in surprise, but Derek doesn’t so much as blink. I have a feeling he’s more used to the effect than he’d ever admit.
“She’s...” The words “She’s everything” almost make it out of my mouth. I stop myself from saying it but can’t prevent my lips from curving.
“Wait.” Derek’s excited expression shifts, the middle of his forehead scrunching. “I know I’ve been absent, but fuck. Did you get a girlfriend without me knowing?”
The vision of Liliana floods my brain. Chocolate brown hair framing a smile not even the most skilled artist could replicate. Remnants of glitter lip gloss begging to be kissed. I feel weightless and in love.
“Yeah.”
“What the fuck!”
“It’s a long story I’ll have to catch you up on eventually, but yeah.” The next words, I’ll never get used to. I grin wider. “Liliana is my girlfriend.”
“Holy shit.” His curious and excited expression falters. “You’re serious?”
I’m not sure if he means about the topic, or about my feelings for her, but the answer is the same regardless. “Yes.”
“Fuck, man.” Derek’s stunned expression finally changes, body slumping into the hard wooden chair and face relaxing. “How much did I miss?”
A lot. Too much.
I can’t say being next to him and joking around completely erases the annoyance built over the months. But it’s subdued enough for me to glance around his apartment.
Color devoid, personality stripped away in favor of the industrial metal and palette of four neutral shades on rotation. All I wear is neutral, and evenmycloset is more diverse than this so-called home is.
I’ve been lonely these few months. But in this dull hell he calls his, who did he have? Scarlet?
With Lily’s voice in my head reminding me there are things I have to work on, too, I can take the time to absorb what this is. We’re two sides of the same coin in how lonely we’ve been. I can empathize with that.
And beyond my resentment, I can find it in myself to forgive.
Derek sits back into his chair and is halfway to taking another sip.
