“But everything’s being taken care of.”
“I don’t care if it’sbeing taken care of.I just want to go home. You don’t have to drive me. I can hitchhike or something.”
Warmth covered her as Blaze’s arms engulfed her, and his strong shoulder pressed against her cheek until she turned and laid her forehead against it. “I’ll take you home, and we’ll figure out how to keep you safe.”
The strain of the last few days, coupled with Blaze’s agonizing accusations, was just too much for Sarah, and stupid tears leaked out of her eyes, which made her miss her cat more. Muffintop purred and snuggled when Sarah had to let some grief out.
He said, “Don’t cry. Please don’t. It’s killing me. I shouldn’t have accused you of that. The whole world was crashing down on me, and I was trying to at least see the last blow coming, even though I knew it was going to kill me. At least I would’ve had the cold solace of being right before I walked out into the wilderness in Canada and lived the rest of my life as a misanthropic hermit because I couldn’t stand humanity anymore.”
Sarah could contemplate him doing that. She even understood the impulse.
“But I was wrong. I was wrong about you. You are the only light left in my life, and I can’t imagine how complete the darkness would be without you. I’ll take you back to your farm and make it safe for you even if I have to stand guard over you twenty-four, seven.”
“It’s okay. I’m sorry, too, that I said those things about you. The last few days are enough to make anybody paranoid.”
Blaze’s quiet chuckle was sad. “It’s not paranoia if they really are trying to kill you.”
“You don’t have to stay on the farm with me. I’ll be fine alone. I’m always fine, even if I am alone.”
“I’ll make sure you’re safe. I have to do that, at least. I could stay for a while.”
“You can’t stay with me on the farm. You might be able to stay awake for four days, but you would have to sleep eventually.”
“I slept last night at the hotel in Cleveland.”
“No, you didn’t. Every time I turned over, you were watching me. When I woke up and tried to sneak out of bed, you were already awake,” she said.
“Well, yeah, but—”
“You weren’t sleeping.”
“I was resting.”
“Resting is not sleeping. You didn’tsleepbecause you don’t trust me. You can’t live with someone if you don’t trust them enough to sleep. You didn’t trust me enough to drive your car for half an hour even though you were too tired to drive safely.”
Blaze didn’t answer, which was good because Sarah didn’t like lying.
“You’re a great guy, Blaze. These few days have been . . . amazing. But you can’t trust me, and I want to go home and stay there no matter what happens. Even if they kill me.”
Blaze’s voice beside her ear was low and gentle. “What if they kill you?”
“I’ve already got everything all set up, just in case Charlie kicks me in the head or I get sick or something. When my parents died, the lawyer who did the inheritance set up a basic will. The animals all have new homes to go to with my friends, and my neighbor will get the land. No use turning the county into more of a hodgepodge patchwork quilt.”
“That’s very rational.”
“I can change my will later if there’s someone else to leave it to. When my mom died, the lawyer said we had to draw something up right then that afternoon, and I couldn’t think of anyone. Saddling my friends with a low-yield farm miles from their own property didn’t seem like a blessing. I should ask Tiffany or Abigail if they would want it, though. It was just too much to think about at the time, and no one wanted to kill me back then.”
His thumb stroked along the edge of her jawline. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
“You need to go back to your own life, Blaze. It’s a lot more interesting than mine.”
He kissed her, probably to shut her up, but it worked.
His soft lips touched hers, a brush of his mouth, and then his arms coiled around her.
Longing rose in Sarah’s heart. As much as a good girl would push him away because good girls didn’t, and good girlsreallydidn’t with guys they knew weren’t interested in marriage and commitment, she wanted him one more time. Maybe it was just another interlude, but being held in Blaze’s arms was the closest she’d ever been to feeling loved.
Maybe someday, someone would really love her, and she would look back at those stolen moments as mere physical passion and maybe with regret for not waiting for the real thing.
