Pah. I will teach you how to dum an aloo, and no one will even ask if you are really Kashmiri or not.
I would like to learn how to make Kashmiri dum aloo, Colleen wrote. Just the thought of the golden-fried baby potatoes baked in spicy cream sauce was making her mouth water.
In another chat window, the small dot indicating TwistyTrader’s attention fell below Colleen’s message.
Colleen typed to Anjali, Damn, TwistyTrader just saw my message. And so it begins.
You stand your ground, Anjali said. Any one of us would have kicked TT for putting up that form. We should have banhammered him months ago. You be firm with him. We have your back.
KK, thanks, she wrote and waited for TwistyTrader’s response while sipping from her water bottle, positive that it was going to be something infuriating. That jerk got away with more violations than anyone else on the Sherwood Forest forums.
She clicked out of her other chat windows so she could concentrate.
He wasn’t a bad guy. He was just . . . twisty.
In TwistyTrader’s chat box on her computer screen, a blue box blinked into view below her green one. Oh, come now, @QueenMod. It was just a hypothetical situation, and people were actively replying to it. No one was hurt. No dick pics were posted.
And there it was, just a suggestion of something lascivious that, for all Anjali’s denials, somehow made the other mods start simpering like a Korean boy band had strolled into the building.
Colleen took a deep breath and metaphorically girded her virtual loins. Look, TwistyTrader, we don’t allow short squeeze coordination or any other methods of manipulating the stock market. The Sherwood Forest forums are dedicated to educating individuals about how to trade stocks and other legal commodities, plus high-level discussions of trends and influences, but not scamming. Head over to the Warrior Forum if you want to scam people. We protect our members here.
She sent that DM with another harsh poke on the Enter key. Dang, this guy. Sherwood Forest had a few questionable traders that the mods kept an eye on. TwistyTrader was at the head of that list.
A green bubble with her message appeared.
And then her computer started ringing with a video call.
Oh, crap. He was video calling her.
She’d never had a forum member videocall her about being moderated before. Colleen stuck her tongue out and made a gagging sound as she reached behind her chair to flip on a bright backlight.
Turning on video calling for the mods had been a bad idea that she’d campaigned against, but efficiency had won. Stupid efficiency. Yelling at guys like TwistyTrader over a videocall was faster than typing out all the reasons why they were so very wrong, but Colleen would rather have typed it out.
Colleen dragged a semi-sheer length of rosy beige chiffon over her head and settled the golden jewelry-weight chains sewn under the fabric over her head and nose. The fake-gold chains kind of resembled the golden strands Anjali wore from her earrings to her nose piercing when she performed classical Indian dance, but Colleen’s face-necklace had additional delicate chains that formed metallic lace over her forehead and the lower half of her face. The veil was part of a Bene Gesserit cosplay costume from the science fiction convention DevilCon a few years ago, back when she’d had the money for cosplay costumes. Still, it would suffice to hide her face during this stupid videocall and preserve her anonymity.
Maybe she could sell the costume. It was a really good cosplay costume, and somebody might pay a hundred dollars or more for it.
Huh. An extra hundred bucks would relieve some of her financial pressure, at least for a month.
She combed the web of chains over her nose and mouth to disguise herself.
Sherwood Forest was an anonymous forum, and stiff rules about privacy kept the mods and traders from being doxed. No one wanted somebody who made a bad trade or got into a forum fight to take revenge by dumping a moderator’s personal information onto the internet, whether it was their social security number, accounts and passwords, or home address.
So the rules were clear and absolute.
No real names.
No identifying info.
No unmasked calls.
Zero tolerance on doxing, swindling, and dick pics. Instant ISP banhammer forever.
Colleen tapped an app on her screen to record the call and then answered the ringing phone icon, making her voice brisk, businesslike, and a little lower for good measure. “TwistyTrader is calling QueenMod at,” she noted the date and time. “The audio and video of this call are being recorded for both our security. How can I help you today?”
TwistyTrader’s video window popped open on her computer. He was heavily backlit as well, just a silhouette with broad shoulders and slivers of light glimmering on the waves of his hair.
His voice was so deep that it sounded like the echoes of a cave that led to the underworld. “Hello, QueenMod. I called to discuss the moderation on my account.”
