He rose and took a step toward her, keeping his movements slow as if approaching a skittish foal. “What I sense in you is raw, intuitive magic. Similar to the energy we Damarians wield, though we refine it with training and ritual. The magic in you recognizes mine, which tells me, like the human females who becomeanimido so by absorbing our power, you’ve done the same thing. But instead of becoming ananimus, you became a shaman.”
Maddie mulled this over. “So I’m not destined to be with one of the Damarians?”
The silver swirls in Roan’s eyes moved faster, and Maddie didn’t miss the way his jaw clenched. “No,” he said curtly. “You are not for any male that has a beast in them.”
“Then who am I for? Are shaman celibate? Oh, crap.” Her eyes widened. “Do I have to take some sacred oath to never have a spouse, mate, whatever it is you all call it? Am I destined to be single for the rest of my life because I have some duty to your kind and your god?” Her breathing was rapid as she considered her questions. Until that moment, it hadn’t occurred to her she might not be allowed to take a mate. Of course, she’d known all of an hour that she had shaman magic flowing through her body.
Roan had the nerve to smile, which was about as close to a laugh as he’d ever given. “Why would you think that?” The corners of his eyes crinkled up.
“Dude, you’ve been in our realm long enough to know why I would think that. Priests and priestesses in tons of societies are commanded to remain single and pure, so they aren’t distracted from serving their god or gods, whichever it might be.”
Roan nodded. “True. You’re very knowledgeable about things that I wouldn’t think one of your age would understand.”
“Katy forces us to watch documentaries. It’s annoying as hell, but I can’t say it hasn’t given me tons of useless knowledge.”
“In this case, it is not useless,” he pointed out. “But neither is it helpful. Shaman can have mates. Typically, a shaman finds his or her mate in the Kingdom of Chaos.”
Maddie frowned. “Why?”
“Because the Damarians in the Kingdom of Chaos cannot call forth another’s beast. They already lack control of their own beast. If a shaman took a shifter oranimusas a mate, we could be unknowingly taking a male’s chance at being whole, and the female’s as well.”
“Do any of the current shaman have mates?”
Roan shook his head. “No. Some have taken lovers, but they haven’t become more than that.” He ran a hand across his face, the start of a five o’clock shadow beginning to show onhis handsome face. “But I think everything we’ve known about shamans is about to change.”
Maddie was perfectly capable of reading between the lines. “Because of me?”
Roan nodded. “Basically, yes. You are new. You’re an unknown, and that is going to make some Damarians nervous.”
Maddie pursed her lips. “If you tell me that they’re going to come marching after me with pitchforks and torches, I might just throat punch you.”
His eyes gleamed. “One thing is certain, life will never be monotonous. It will be interesting to watch your magic grow and reshape under our guidance. Though your power will likely be … unique.”
Great, she was going to be the weird shaman who read tarot cards and cast spells with funky human elements like computer coding or emojis. Oddly, the thought didn’t disturb Maddie like she’d expected. This was uncharted territory, like Roan said. It was her role to shape as she wished.
Still, uncertainty lingered. “What does this mean for my life going forward?” She searched Roan’s face, which had returned to its natural state of RSBF, a.k.a resting shaman bitch face. “Will I have to leave everything behind?” Fear squeezed her heart that this emerging power might separate her from her friends and family.
Roan’s stern expression softened marginally. “Nothing needs to be decided today. And you would not walk the shaman path alone.” He paused awkwardly. “I will be here to teach you.”
Maddie blinked in surprise at his offer, something warm unfurling inside her. Maybe he wasn’t such an insensitive caveman under all the gruffness. She managed a tiny smile. “You sure you want to make that offer?”
“It wasn’t an offer. It’s a statement of fact.”
“Anyone ever told you that you’re the king of being an overbearing ass?”
The corner of Roan’s mouth quirked slightly before he grew serious again. “There are aspects of the shaman’s call that can be … challenging at first.” His jaw tightened. “Our magic comes from a primal place, even though we don’t have a beast living within us. It must be handled with great care and wisdom.”
Sensing that there was a lot he wasn’t saying, Maddie only nodded. Baby steps. She’d tackle the heavy, mystic stuff later. Right now she needed distraction from her own messy thoughts and speculating on what her friends could be facing in the bayou.
She aimed for a lighter tone. “Well, since you’re supposed to be mentoring me anyway, what’s my first lesson, Teach?”
Roan looked briefly surprised by her flippancy before shaking his head wryly. “You truly are an odd one.” He moved closer and held out a hand. “Lesson one. Creating light. The basis for many spells is calling energies from one realm into another. We can’t cross into other realms because we sealed them when we came through, but we’re still able to access the power there because it is a part of us.”
Maddie lifted her hand slowly to his, her pulse increasing as their skin brushed. His magic was there, simmering just below the surface. She wanted to understand it, to learn to harness this newfound gift. There had been a growing fear inside of her as her friends discovered they were a part of this world and she was not. Maddie hadn’t wanted to admit that she was scared she’d get left behind while her two best friends moved on with their exciting lives. Though, now that she was a part of this world, how was she going to explain it to her mom? She’d already lied about a silly, last-minute road trip. Her mom hadn’t been pleased about it, but she’d been surprisingly understanding. Since then she’s sent a few texts just checking in, letting her mom know shewas still alive. Roan cleared his throat, and it pulled her from her thoughts.
Maddie’s gaze locked with Roan’s. “Focus on the warmth inside of you. It will feel like heat in your gut. Imagine it as a ball of light and will it to manifest.”
At first, nothing happened. Then a tiny orb of soft light flickered to life above their clasped palms. It was no bigger than a firefly, but warmth rushed through Maddie at having done it.
