“I’m in my happy place.” She sounded drowsy. “Do your worst.” She held up the hand that didn’t have a tourniquet on it. “Wait. Actually do your absolute best. I have no idea why ‘do your worst’ is even a saying. It’s ridiculous.” She lowered her hand, her eyes never having opened. “Okay, I’m done. Carry on.”
Lizzy hated needles. And the fact that she was about to get stabbed with one was freaking her out. Okay, maybe that was a little irrational, considering what was about to go down. Perhaps Lizzy should have been a little more worried over having vampire blood shoved into her veins. Not to mention the scientist’s. Who the hell knew what that woman was. What if Alice is a siren? Were sirens even a thing? If vampires and werewolves were a thing, then there most definitely had to be sirens. Right? But if she was a siren, wouldn’t she be able to make Lizzy want to do what Alice wanted? Wasn’t that a siren sort of talent?
Regardless of what she is, Lizzy mentally shrugged, she wasn’t excited about sharing any bodily fluids with the scientist, either. But Lizzy had watched so many addicts shoot up over the years that she had developed a fear that was, admittedly, a tad irrational. Yet seeing the junkies ruin their minds and bodies for a tiny ounce of liquid in a syringe left a lasting effect. In her mind, needles represented the ugliness that drugs brought out in people. They were the method in which people chose to slowly kill themselves, or, sometimes, quickly killed themselves, with. She wanted no part of the needle. But what could she do? She was a nineteen-year-old girl up against an ancient vampire. Maybe she should have watched more Buffy the Vampire Slayer episodes when she’d been in foster care. Perhaps then she’d be able to have a chance in hell of getting herself out of this situation. Okay, that was a lie. It didn’t matter how many times she watched Buffy kick a vampire’s ass, Lizzy was SOL. The way the other four vampires had easily subdued her proved that. And this guy was the king. She could only assume he would be even more powerful.
She could feel Finn pushing at the walls in her mind, and Lizzy wanted so badly to drop them and let him in—to find comfort in his presence through the bond. The absolute rightness she had experienced communicating with him over the past several days had changed Lizzy. Now that she had experienced the connection with Finn, Lizzy felt more alone than ever when she blocked him. She needed him.
She didn’t want to, but she did. Lizzy didn’t want to need Finn because she knew that needing him meant that he could hurt her. Or that she might be hurt because of him. After all she’d endured in her brief life, Lizzy knew better than to make herself vulnerable. She also didn’t like the idea of Finn being hurt, which was surprising. She had been concerned for the welfare of others at one time, but that had been a long time ago. Lizzy knew it would hurt Finn if he knew what was going on. From what he had described about the bond, true mates could actually experience the powerful emotions of each other. So he would be required to go through this experience with her, and he wouldn’t be able to do anything to help her. In the short time she’d gotten to talk to Finn, Lizzy had realized without a doubt that he was a good man. Maybe he was a little skewed in his worldview, considering he’d come of his own free will to help the vampire. But hey, who was she to judge? She had also hopped her happy ass onto the team vampire train with a wink and a smile.
“Lizzy!” His voice barreled into her mind at the exact moment she felt the prick of a needle in her arm.
She gasped and squeezed her eyes tightly closed. Seconds went by, and Lizzy drew in several deep breaths, trying to shove her fear and anxiety back into the box from which it had just exploded.
“Lizzy, Lizzy, Lizzy.” Finn’s voice repeated in her head. She was surprised at how much it helped her calm herself.
“Okay, try not to freak out,” she told him when she was finally able to gather herself.
“That’s not really the way you start a conversation when you don’t want someone to freak out,” he growled. She felt waves of frustration and anger flood through her but also an oversized measure of his comfort.
She took several more deep breaths and let them out slowly. The needle sliding into her arm almost sent her back into a tailspin. But the emotions Finn was hitting her with like a hurricane won her attention, distracting her from the cold, thin steel entering her body.
“I’m in the vein, Lizzy,” Alice patted her hand. “No more sticks.”
“Fabulous,” Lizzy said dryly. “Knowing I might be dead in a few minutes is so much easier to handle now that I don’t have to worry about being stuck again.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Finn snapped. Lizzy heard panic in his voice.
She sighed. “Again, you’re going to have to tone that crap down, dude. I can’t handle your stress while I’m trying to figure out if this blood is killing me. Let me focus.”
“You want me to let you focus on whether you are about to die? How can I… I can’t…”
Lizzy mentally rolled her eyes at him. “I’m sorry, Finn. I can’t really explain all this right now. A little too much is going on. I appreciate your concern over me, but I’m a bit… preoccupied right now.”
She felt a hand on her face and knew it was Finn using their bond. “I forbid you to die.”
A burst of laughter bubbled out of her.
“Is she okay?”
She ignored Willis. “Not exactly what I was expecting,” she told Finn. “But I am so glad to know that you can totally keep me from dying by simply forbidding it. And to think, I’ve been worried about this vampire killing me for weeks. All this time, you could have just prevented me from dying.”
“I just found you, mate.” His voice was filled with vulnerability that she would bet he wasn’t used to feeling. “How can I lose you now?”
The emotions coming from Finn through the bond made her body tremble. This man wanted her. And not because of what she could give him, or that she could satisfy some physical desire. Because of the mystical bond, she actually knew why he cared for her because she could read his thoughts. And honestly, it terrified her.
Lizzy’s palms were sweaty, and her stomach roiled. But other than the physical effects Finn’s emotions were causing her, she didn’t feel like she was dying. Sadly, at nineteen years old, she was pretty certain she knew what it felt like to die, or at least to wish she would die. Living without protection as a teen in an unforgiving world and managing to keep from being raped, stabbed, or kidnapped wasn’t exactly an easy feat. She’d been beaten to within an inch of her life but still hadn’t died. She’d coughed up blood before and felt the gurgling in her lungs. None of that was happening. Thank goodness. Though she also knew that death could be silent and still. She’d seen druggies simply drift away, looking as if they had just fallen asleep. At times, she had been envious of the peace they finally had. But none of the things she’d experienced or seen were happening. She just sat there, her heart beating a little faster than usual.
“My Lizzy.” Finn called to her, and the hand she’d felt on her face seemed to nudge her a bit. “Your thoughts are killing me. Please tell me you are well.”
He seemed slightly calmer than he was a minute ago, although she could feel his pain and anger over what he’d no doubt just learned about her life before Cain and her current situation. “I’m pretty sure I’m not dying. So that’s good.”
“Can you show me your surroundings? Who is with you?” Apparently they weren’t going to address all of the crap she’d just unleashed from her memories… which was probably a good thing.
She didn’t want to open her eyes. Lizzy was afraid that if she looked at the faces of the three people in the room, she’d lose her shit. Not just because she was angry at them for being selfish pricks, but because she was mad at herself. She’d managed to stay alive, though not unscathed, for quite a while on her own, and yet she’d marched right into the lion's den, or actually vampire's den to be more accurate. Looking at their faces was a reminder of how stupid she had been to trust Cain. Lizzy had allowed herself to get into this situation in the first place. She should have just stayed on the street. Eventually she would have figured out a way off it. Or she would have died. It was really a toss-up every single day. But at least that kept things from being boring, right?
“That’s no way to live,” Finn said. “I should have been there to protect you. Everything I’ve seen in your mind is abhorrent to me and my wolf. You should never have had to endure that.”
“You can’t blame yourself for my past, Finn. There’s a reason I came into this life as I did and a reason that I had to grow up the way I did. I don’t know what the reasons are, at least not yet, but I don’t believe I went through it all for nothing. I’m not going to say it doesn’t suck. But I can’t change it, and dwelling on it won’t do any good.”
