“Jennifer,” he said gently as he walked up to her. Her moods were unpredictable, and she could go from playful to downright violent in the blink of an eye. He placed his fingers under her chin and lifted her head gently until she was looking up at him and then said firmly, “Everything is going to be okay.”
Jen wanted to believe him.She was being ridiculous, and what was even more ridiculous was that she knew she was being ridiculous. And now she was using the word ridiculous way too many times in a sentence. She pressed a kiss to his lips and then headed for the bathroom. If she stood there any longer, Jen was afraid she would break out into hysterics. Wouldn’t that be dignifying?
She closed the door gently behind her, leaned back against it, closed her eyes, and released a long sigh. “What the hell is wrong with me?” she muttered under her breath. Jen understood, thanks to the internet, which she frantically searched to ensure she wasn’t completely crazy, that hormones made things difficult after pregnancy. Throw in the fact that the delivery had been under extreme, deadly, duress—after all, a good friend sacrificed her life for the non-feeding baby, never sleeping, always crying bundle of joy—and boom, you’ve got the potential for World War III brought on solely by a postpartum nut job. Ain’t life grand?
Jen walked over to the tub and turned the water off before it could overflow into the floor. Then she stripped out of her clothes. As she laid them on the bathroom counter, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror … and wished she hadn’t.
“Oh, COME ON,” she said as she looked at her still-swollen stomach and her breasts that looked like balloons filled with water to maximum capacity, which were now on the verge of bursting. Really folks, it was not pretty. To top it off, she was leaking like a busted faucet. Shouldn’t milk production be like on-demand manufacturing or a made-from-scratch burger at a restaurant? Baby latches on and then,pow, order up. That made so much more sense than lugging around two full, heavy, milk sacks all the time.
Unable to look at herself any longer, she climbed into the tub and let the hot water loosen her tight muscles. She hadn’t been in ten minutes when the leaking got worse.
“Damn hot water,” Jen groaned. “Damn boobs, damn freaking I don’t know what else, but just dammit, dammit, dammit.” Each word was punctuated with a firm slap against the water.
The door to the bathroom flew open as Decebel barged inside. “What’s wrong? Are you okay? You yelled.”
Jen’s eyes were wide as she stared up at her mate. “I look like a kangaroo with breasts. Leaky breasts, I might add. And the warm water just makes it worse. My stomach still looks like I’m six months pregnant, and my stretch marks look like a roadmap. So, no, I am most definitely not okay.”
“Jennifer, baby.” Decebel knelt by the tub and spoke with a level of patience she couldn’t believe he still had. He reached out his large hand and gently pushed stray strands of hair from her face. “I know it all seems overwhelming right now, but it won’t be like this forever. You thought you’d be pregnant forever, and now you’re not. Sooner than you realize, Thia will be eating solid foods, and you won’t have leaky breasts anymore. Your beautiful stomach will flatten back out, and if it doesn’t, that’s just more of you to love.”
“What about the stretch marks, all-knowing wolf?” She raised a brow at him.
He shrugged. “They’re a badge of honor. Every time I see them, they’re a reminder to me that you carried our child, nurtured her for nine months, and sacrificed your body for the precious gift. They don’t diminish my attraction of you. They increase it.”
Jen wanted to search his mind to see if he truly believed the words he spoke, but that would be rude. She’d have to trust Decebel meant what he said, no matter how much her crazy post-partum brain was telling her there was no way he could be attracted to her. She looked nothing like the slim-figured, perky-breasted, flawless-skinned woman he’d met. She was vain. Write a blog post about her for all she cared. Jen liked her body … her previous body, anyway. She had always been confident in her appearance, whether clothed or naked. She’d never before felt insecure or vulnerable, and she was quickly realizing both of those feelings sucked.
“Part of me wants to say thank you and swoon, but a bigger part of me wants to call B.S. on you, Decebel. Stretch marks and swollen stomachs? Yeah, I see a ton of those on the covers of swimsuit magazines. And they’re everywhere you turn on TV.” She rolled her eyes and snorted.
Decebel frowned at her. “I don’t buy swimsuit magazines and I don’t watch television, so I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”
“But you are still a man, with hormones and eyeballs.”
“I’m also a wolf. We see the world differently. We have different values. Our hormones don’t control us nearly as strongly as other primal instincts. The drive to protect and provide for our mate, our family, our pack. Those instincts are far stronger. As much as I appreciate your beauty, Jennifer, your other qualities are far more important to me and my wolf. Besides, would you prefer I not have hormones or eyeballs?”
She thought about it, tapping her lip as she narrowed her eyes at him. “Naw, you better keep the hormones. They give you a sexy, deep voice. But the eyeballs can totally go. You don’t need eyeballs to be a man.”
Decebel growled at her. “Without eyeballs I wouldn’t be able to see you.”
“Ding, ding, ding. You got it, contestant number one. Tell the man what he’s won, Alec.”
“Who’s Alec?” Decebel asked, his brow furrowed.
“Why do you always focus on the unimportant parts of a conversation?”
He crossed his arms and slid to the floor, leaning his back against the wall. “You say so much, I have to weed out the really unimportant parts to get to anything of real consequence. Sometimes it’s tricky.”
“Do you want to die?” Jen growled. She started to stand but then remembered her kangaroo body and sank back down into the hot bubble bath.
Decebel smirked at her.
“Saved by the leaky breasts and stomach pooch.” She huffed. “But as you pointed out, it won’t be like this forever.”
“You’re going to hold a grudge until you no longer have those issues?”
“Maybe.”
“Won’t that be exhausting?”
“Dude, I’m married to you. Everything else is a breeze.” Jen grinned at his scowl.
