“You don’t give yourself enough credit, Jennifer.”
They sat in silence as Decebel pulled her into his lap and wrapped his arms around her. There had been only a handful of times in his life that he’d felt well and truly helpless, and yet this was the worst of them all. If they didn’t get Thia back, Decebel didn’t know how either of them would survive such a loss.
Decebel lost track of time as he sat there brooding. Eventually, the door to their suite opened and Fane, Jacque, Costin, and Sally walked in. His wolf wanted to lunge at the intruders, but he couldn’t move, so he simply glared at them.
“Jen,” Jacque said softly as they moved further into the room. “I’m so sorry. I know, I mean, I realize…” Jacque paused, took a deep breath, and tried again. “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have taken Thia from her bed without asking you first. If I’d have just left her, then she’d still be here, and Decebel wouldn’t want to kill Fane and Costin, and you wouldn’t be so calm.”
“What’s wrong with me being calm?” Jen asked as she lifted her head from his shoulder.
Sally was staring at Decebel’s mate like she’d lost her mind. “Your baby is missing! You were threatening people before she was missing and acting like a crazed lunatic. But now she’s gone. Why aren’t you threatening to kill everything in sight? Why aren’t any of you wolves out of control?”
“GET OUT,” Decebel roared at the healer, uncaring that it would no doubt piss her mate off.
“Now that”—Sally pointed to Decebel—“that’s how a wolf is supposed to react when one of their pups goes missing.”
Jen held up a hand to stop Sally, or Decebel, or maybe both. “Thia is my daughter.”
“Well then raise those damn hackles and get fierce, she-wolf,” Sally yelled.
“I CAN’T,” Jen screamed back, nearly coming up out of her mate’s lap. But Decebel kept an arm around her, needing her close. “I can’t just lose it! If I give in to the need to tear everything and anything apart because of my anger and fear, then I will do things and say things that I won’t be able to take back. I am a lot of things, and have been a lot of things these past few days, but I won’t be useless to Thia. And if I give in to my emotions, that is exactly what I will be to her, useless. So don’t you dare tell me how to handle losing my child. Until you have a baby that you’ve carried inside of you for nine months, birthed, nursed, held, cried over, laughed over, and then lost … until then, you keep your damn gypsy healer mouth shut.”
The room was completelysilent as Jen attempted to control her anger. She knew she had just done the opposite of what she’d said. She’d lost it and taken it out on Sally. But the healer’s words made Jen feel as if the others thought she didn’t care about her daughter. That hurt. But snapping at her friend’s wouldn’t accomplish anything? It wouldn’t bring Thia back any faster.
“You’re right,” Sally said gently. “I’m sorry. I don’t know…” Sally’s words trailed off as Costin wrapped an arm around her and pulled her tightly to his body.
Jen closed her eyes, let out a deep breath, and then nodded. “Okay,” she said finally. “We don’t blame you guys.” Jen looked at her two best friends and then their mates. “It’s not your fault she was taken. It isn’t as if you set her down in the mall and walked off. Okay?” She pinched Decebel’s leg.“Tell them you don’t blame them,”she growled through their bond.
“I try not to lie, especially to those I’m planning to maim.”
“I think your mate blames us,” Jacque said.
“No, I don’t,” Decebel finally spoke.
Jen let out a sigh.
“I blame them,” he motioned toward Costin and Fane.
Sigh retracted,Jen thought as she glared at her mate.
“Why do you blame them and not us?” Sally asked.
“Because they have balls I can rip off. If you really want me to blame you, go grow a pair and come back.”
“Remind me when this is all over that you talked about grabbing Fane and Costin’s junk,”Jen said through their bond as she stared at the shocked faces of her best friends.
“While we’re off growing balls, can we get you anything?” Jacque asked. “Hot chocolate?”
Jen shook her head. “No, but thank you. I think we, and when I say we, I mean him”—she pointed to her mate—“just need some quiet time.”
“So, duct tape?” Jacque offered.
“You know me so well, Red.” Jen smiled, though she knew it didn’t reach her eyes. Just as the four of them were turning back toward the door, Jen spoke again. “Wait. Just because I’m a glutton for punishment, I have to ask, why are Costin and Fane’s hands and forearms blue? I mean, you mentioned Costin’s blue body paint fetish, but I’m not sure how Fane factors in. Unless you two are a lot freakier than I originally thought.”
“Are you really sure you want to know?” Costin asked.
“Seeing as how I got nothing but worrying and time on my hands, adding a little bit of ridiculousness, which I’m sure this is bound to be, seems completely appropriate.”
“Might as well take a seat,” Jacque said as she moved back toward the love seat.
