Peri waved her off. “It’s a Jen thing.”
“Enough said,” Cyn replied, holding up her hand as if to stop any further explanation from the high fae.
“Speaking of Jen.” Peri paused and narrowed her eyes. “I’m about to have one of her moments. I’m giving you fair warning.”
“What’s the point in warning me?” Cyn asked. “Jen moments are a force all their own. They can’t be stopped.”
Peri shrugged. “I like to cover my bases. Now, shh. I’m reaching for my inner Jen. Let’s see, there was blade foreplay involved. I’m sure it was wrought with enough sexual tension to choke an elephant. Why, then, haven’t you made a whole castle full of littlefaelfybabies with the prince?”
Cyn tried to refrain but the eye roll came anyway. “Faelfy?” Cyn’s eyes crinkled at the sides as her face pulled into a smile that looked as if it was induced by pain. “I think this thing you have going on with Jennifer is a tad unhealthy.”
“And I think Thalion is just the stallion you need to ride off into the sunset with. Get it? Stallion? Ride? I know, I know. When I’m in touch with my inner Jen, it somehow blends with my own awesomeness. I’m unstoppable!”
Cyn’s head dropped forward and met the palm of her hand as she groaned. “Tell me why I thought it a good idea to share my dilemmas with you?”
“Cyn, you’re you. One of a kind. No one knows why you do anything you do.”
“That’s not a flattering statement.”
“I wasn’t trying to be flattering.”
“Would you like me to continue, or is your inner Jen busy having an orgy with you inner Peri?” Cyn asked coolly.
“You know, once upon a time, you weren’t so mouthy,” Peri said as she renegotiated her seat, holding her nose in the air.
“I’ve been around you for the better part of a thousand years, and you are surprised that I’ve given up on indifference and joined the dark side of sarcasm?” Cyn scoffed.
“Can’t argue with that logic. Alas, I’m done derailing your story.” Peri sighed. “I totally suck at thisbeing a listening earkind of a friend.”
Cyn smiled at her though it didn’t reach her eyes. “You’re a good commander. That’s more important.”
The high fae snorted a laugh. “Youwould think that. Do you think that it’s more important that you be a fae warrior than the other half of someone’s soul?”
“I don’t know anymore. Had you asked me that a couple of centuries ago, I would have said yes without hesitation. But now, after him, I don’t know.”
“What are you afraid of?” Peri asked, all joking and sarcasm evaporated. “What could a warrior of your capability be afraid of?”
“Making a poor decision,” Cyn answered immediately. “It’s the same in battle. Choosing incorrectly in the middle of a fight can kill you or, worse, one of your soldiers. Turn to the left when you should have gone right, parry with the jab of a short blade when you should have used a sword. What if I choose wrong? I might not be the only one that is destroyed.”
Peri was quiet, and Cyn was lost in the suffocating fear that she couldn’t seem to overcome. “When did I become such a coward?” Cyn finally breathed out.
“You’re not a coward,” Peri snapped. “I don’t make it a point to associate with cowards.”
“Did I say that out loud?” Cyn asked.
“There is nothing cowardly about protecting your heart, Cyn,” Peri said, ignoring her question. “You aren’t running away. You’re stepping back to evaluate your emotions and the possibilities. You have every right to guard your heart. It’s the only one you will ever have, and it can only withstand so many beatings. That pun was totally not intended.”
“Jen would be proud.”
“That she would. Now shut up and listen. If Thalion is the one meant for you, then he will wait for all of eternity for you to choose him.”
“But he said he wouldn’t accept less than all of me. I told him I might not be able to give him all of me, that my soul might belong to another. He won’t accept that. He won’t take my love and my heart alone. He wants us together—forever. But what if forever isn’t mine to give?”
Peri stared back at her wide-eyed. “I got nothing. Bloody hell, where is Alina when you need her?” And then Peri flashed and was gone. When she reappeared, she had the arm of a very disheveled looking Alina Lupei in her grasp.
“You woke her up?” Cyn’s eyes widened.
Peri chuckled. “Oh no.” Peri shook her head. “No, no. Our wolf queen was definitelynotasleep.”
