“And what?” Junie is twisting back to look at me, so I come to stand in front of the swing and pull her toward me with one hand while I hold my phone in the other.
“You think you want her back? How do you feel, V?”
I don’t even have to think about how I feel. I know. “I don’t want to go back. There’s no doubt about that.”
“What about Eden?” he asks. “You think you want to give the whole relationship thing a try again?”
Juniper’s grin is enormous, her drooly lips parted to reveal her tiny baby teeth as she swings. “I’m in this. No question in my mind,” I say, slowing the swing with one hand. “I don’t know what Eden thinks, but for me, this is it. This is what I want.”
Franco snorts, and I can just picture him shaking his head. “You going to be cool if she’s taking classes with Michelle? I can’t fucking believe your stripper ex-wife is teaching college.”
“Hey, hey,” I say, a warning in my voice. “Michelle was always smart. You know that. Big dreams, big goals. I wouldn’t be surprised by anything she set her mind to doing.” I do have to consider his question, though.
“About damn time,” he says, and I can hear the smile in his voice. “Happy for you, bro. Can I give you two pieces of advice?”
“Sure,” I say, but I probably don’t want to hear whatever sage advice he’s about to give.
“Make sure Eden knows how you feel. Offer to talk to Michelle if that would help. Don’t let anything go unsaid, so you never have to question whether you did everything you could to make this work.”
His words hit me deep. He knows I did damn near everything I could think of to make things work between Michelle and me, but it wasn’t enough.
“What’s the other thing?” I ask, pulling a fussy Juniper from the swing. “And make it quick. I got a toddler I got to chase.” I set Junie on the rubbery turf and let her run to a seesaw thing that looks like a plastic horse.
“Don’t tell Ma that Eden met Michelle. Keep that shit buttoned down.”
I bark out a laugh. “Got it, Franco. Thanks for the call. Rain check on drinks.” I hang up and slide the phone into my back pocket just in time to help Juniper climb onto the back of a yellow plastic horse.
I haven’t been this close to dating someone seriously since Michelle and I broke up.
It may be awkward, but if this is what I want, I need to do everything I can to make it work.
And maybe, just maybe, this time, I’ll be enough.
12
EDEN
This is goingto be the longest three hours of my life.
Okay, no, scratch that. I’m being dramatic.
Going through labor and delivery alone… Those were the longest hours of my life.
But at least I had a gorgeous baby to snuggle at the end of the pain.
Sitting in a classroom being taught by the ex-wife of the guy I’m into? This was definitely not on the list of things I expected to live through in my life.
As soon as I realized that my instructor was Vito’s ex-wife, time dragged. Of course, the first thing I fixated on was how goddamn gorgeous Michelle was.
For the most part, I’m comfortable with my body with its stretch marks and many flaws, but come on.
“All right, everybody.” Michelle claps her hands together to silence the small talk and chatter right at the stroke of seven. “Thank you all for coming tonight. I know most of you have jobs, families, and a lot of responsibilities outside of this class, so even though this is our sixth week together, I want to thank you for showing up. This is also my not-so-subtle reminder to silence your phones and keep your attention—” she sweeps a hand toward the whiteboard affixed to the wall behind her “—on the work we’re here to do.”
She turns her back to us for a moment and writes a word on the whiteboard in blue marker. I watch her arms, thin and moving fast in a pristine white shirt, before she faces the classroom, adjusts the black-framed glasses over her eyes, and points to me.
“We have a visitor tonight, someone who is thinking of enrolling in this course. Eden,” she says, giving me a warm smile that hits me right in the face like a spotlight. “While you are a guest, you’re part of this class, so feel free to raise your hand and ask questions anytime.”
I feel the eyes of half the class on me. My cheeks burn, but I manage to smile and mouth thank you, even though my throat is suddenly so dry, I don’t think I could speak even if I wanted to.
