“This part’s harder,” I tell him. “I believe in this vision more than anything, but I don’t want you to change your business model because of me and where I live or where I might want to live. I’m falling in love with Gracie, and I want to see where that goes. Enough that I’ve decided I’m going to stay put in Star Falls. This is your dream, man, and I support it even if I can’t be part of it.”
Austin kicks the spongy turf beneath the swings with the tip of his running shoe. “I appreciate you doing some digging on that ballplayer,” he says. “That could have been a minefield I stepped right into.” He looks disappointed but says, “Would you consider maybe being a consultant for the company? You can work from home and maybe come down to Columbus for a weekend when something can’t be done online?”
“Really?” I ask, shocked he’s still trying to find a way for me to stay part of the business.
“Heck yeah. Most things can be done online now. I really value your input, Ryder, and there’s no one else I trust more than you, too. It won’t take up much time, and I promise it won’t interfere with your current job or life.”
“I’m only working part time right now. A teacher is retiring next year, and I’ll be getting his position. But I do have the rest of this school year, and my summers are free except for coaching, which includes training and practice for the next season.”
“So, Gracie’s the real deal, huh? You’re staying put for good. You’re home?”
“Yeah, she is.”
“I’m happy for you, buddy. Really happy for you.”
“It’s just…” Cora wants off the swing, so I wait to answer the question until both my kids have climbed the ladder to the curly slide. While Luke goes down first and Cora stands at the top waiting for her turn, I explain. “My whole marriage was a lie.”
Austin lowers his eyes and nods. “I know, Ryder. I can’t imagine…”
I sigh. “I hope you never have to either. Every day, I tried to make things better. I tried to prove I was worth the life I had, even though, deep down, I always knew I’d never be what Elizabeth really wanted. That’s the thing about Gracie. I always know what she thinks. Where she stands. I never, ever have to worry that she’s giving me some bullshit.”
“It’s rare to find someone you trust,” he says, a bitterness underlying his words. “And even when you do trust someone…”
He doesn’t have to finish that thought. I don’t know how badly Austin’s ex fucked him over, but I know that what I went through with Elizabeth is something he can relate to. The only difference is I ended up having two kids as a permanent reminder that I wasn’t enough.
But with Grace, I feel like I am enough. More than enough. I feel like I’m exactly what she wants. We’re so different, and yet, we’re exactly the same in the ways that matter.
Our families mean everything. Our work is important, but family comes first. Honesty and trust, directness and integrity. I know the hours she puts in helping at the shop that she doesn’t get paid for. The time she spends because she wants to make a difference to her employees and her town.
She is what I want, and I believe she wants me. Where we’ll be come summer or next spring or two winters from now, I don’t know. But I know what we have is worth trying for. Worth putting first. Ahead of Austin’s opportunity. Ahead of any lingering doubts, insecurities, or fears that might hold me back.
“She’s going to win out if I have to choose,” I tell Austin with a grin. “I mean, come on. Look at her. Look at you.”
“I’d worry if you didn’t pick her,” Austin laughs. “So, I’ll send text and email updates. If it’s urgent or exciting, I’ll call, and we’ll just play it by ear week to week.”
“I’d like that,” I tell him. We clap hands and pull each other into a half hug. “So, what’s next for you? You going to start dating or just keep your nose deep in sports stats and business plans?”
“Definitely the second,” he grits out. I can tell by the tension in his voice that he’s not ready to talk.
Thankfully, the kids are.
“Dad!” Luke screams. “Cora ate a piece of gum from the slide. It was just sitting there, and I told her not to touch it, and she ate it anyway.”
Austin looks like he’s going to be sick, and I raise a brow at him. “Parenthood. Most exciting game you’ll ever play.” Then I trot over to the slide to find Cora, working her jaw on the old piece of gum. “Did you put something from the slide in your mouth?”
This is one of those moments I’m sure I’ll forget in twenty years. I won’t care about how many pieces of used gum my kids ate, if they cried through their naps, or whether they ate their broccoli.
“You think you could watch the kids again tonight? I need to talk to Gracie. I’ll stay until the kids go down, and then I need two hours, tops.”
“Ryder, who are you bullshitting? You’ll last maybe five minutes. You’ll be there and back in under thirty.”
I smack him in the arm. “Don’t be an asshole. I’m just going to talk to her.”
He smirks. “Sure, man. Whatever you say.”
19
GRACIE
