I tell her about Austin’s gym idea, and even though I don’t know a lot of details, she agrees it sounds like an amazing opportunity. Something that would be perfect for me. Great for the kids.
“Austin said he’d consider launching here in Star Falls, but I don’t know if he meant it. But what if it doesn’t work?” I ask. “What if I end up accepting the job, but then I need to move to Columbus in three or six months anyway? It’s a ton of risk. I mean, my god. I trust Austin with my kids, but trusting him with my financial future?”
She frowns. “So many start-ups don’t make it even when they are well-funded. Having a good idea and great people isn’t enough. I didn’t have anyone else to consider when I started The Body Shop. If it failed, it wouldn’t hurt anyone, except it would sting a little for me.”
I nod. I wish it was easier to know I’m doing the right thing. I wish I could just follow my heart and not have to worry about the lives and futures that depend on my making the right choices.
“I can’t believe I’m responsible for making a choice this big and there’s no clear path,” I say. “I mean, following my heart felt a lot simpler when I was in college. Now? How do I look at Luke and Cora and tell them we’re moving again? Or in six months if the business fails and I have to…I don’t know what, Gracie. It’s scary.”
She looks into my eyes. “I don’t know if I could lose you. And I don’t know how to tell you to make this decision. All I can say is every decision I’ve ever made, I made with my heart. Not my head.” She sighs. “And fuck, those haven’t all been good. But at least I knew I went with what I wanted, Ryder. If you deny yourself what you think you want, even if you think it’s for the good of your kids, don’t you think that could lead to resentment someday? Not toward your kids, of course, but toward the world, toward life? I don’t know if I could make a good choice if I felt backed into a corner.”
“I have options, though,” I tell her. “If I take the job with Austin and it doesn’t work out, I can probably go back to Columbus and teach there. But then we’re right back to where we started. Where do I go and why?”
She nods. “I’m going to make this really simple for you, because what I want is easy. My life is here, Ryder. But there’s more to consider than that. You have other people counting on you.”
I lift her face to mine and kiss her. She tastes like strawberries and cheesecake, and it’s the best damn thing I’ve ever tasted. I can’t imagine leaving her any more than I can imagine letting her down.
“But,” she continues, “Columbus isn’t that far away. We could do the long-distance thing for a while.”
The crater in my heart fills immediately at her words. The fact that she would consider a long-distance relationship means something. This is a woman I can make decisions around. Make decisions with. Most of all, I need to make decisions in my life because she’s in it.
“I can’t take you from this place,” I tell her. “Benito’s restaurant. The Body Shop. Your family. Everyone you’ve known. There’s still a chance it could work here in Star Falls. Austin has some ideas.”
As we talk about logistics, I start yawning. I’m exhausted and should probably get some sleep before I head home.
“You going to sleep here or leave now?” she asks.
“I’ll set an alarm to get home before the kids wake up. Do you want to tell your parents where you are, so we don’t have a repeat?”
She shakes her head and tosses the towel aside to curl up with me. “No. They know I’m with you. I told them there is a chance I wouldn’t come home until tomorrow.”
She snuggles against me, and I stroke her hair, when a thought occurs to me. “Gracie, do you or your brothers know anything about Levi Olson?”
Gracie sits upright, clutching the blanket to her chest. She’s glaring at me, a wild, angry look on her face. “What do I know about Levi Olson?”
“Yeah. By the look on your face, I’d say it’s nothing good.”
She cackles in the darkest way. “Not a damn thing.”
“Austin heard he was a hometown boy who’s coming back to Star Falls. One of the ideas he brainstormed for keeping me in Star Falls was reaching out to the guy to see if he wants to sponsor or in some way affiliate with the kids gym.”
“Levi Olson, sponsoring a kids gym? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. That’s ripe.”
“What happened?” I ask, completely confused by how pissed she seems. “Based on your answer, I’d say you know him, know him. Is he an asshole or something? I told Austin the guy might have some baggage…”
“Baggage,” she says, her lips trembling. “I’ll tell you what kind of baggage Levi Olson has. And then you tell me if you still want to work with him.”
“What did he do to you?”
All the sleepiness of a few minutes ago has disappeared. Now I’m worried.
“If that asshole hurt you…” I say, starting to get worked up.
She blurts out the whole story then.When she’s done, when it’s over, she hangs her head as she sits on the edge of the bed.
“I can’t do this,” she says quietly. “It’s taken all my strength to put myself out there again. It was hard enough that you have kids, and this is nothing against Luke and Cora, but Ryder, I can’t take another heartbreak. I’ve been working through that, but to have Levi Olson come back to town, and to think of you courting him…”
“I won’t,” I promise. “I don’t care what’s at stake for Austin’s business. That fucker hurt you, Gracie. The last thing you have to worry about is that I’m going to work with the guy. I don’t do business with men who treat women like shit, and I’m guessing you’re not the first woman he’s done this to. Tell me how to find him. Give me his number. While Austin’s in town, we’ll pay him a visit.”
